Most governments back to the dawn of human civilization have been aware of the perplexing paranormal world. Often they’ve worked to keep its secrets from the general populace for their own benefit and to prevent panic. However, the further back in history you go the more citizens who knew about the supernatural and even directly participated in it! All US President’s have been briefed on the state of planetary paranormal affairs in their particular era. Most modern Presidents had no idea so much of the supernatural was real while earlier Presidents, including the Founding Fathers, knew full well the world was a far more dangerous place than it appeared to be!
President George Washington Takes Down Monsters With His Trusty Hatchet
Our first President George Washington wasn’t just chopping down cherry trees with his hallowed hatched. Even as a child this magnificent bastard was taking down vampires, werewolves, and even random zombies in the woodlands and fields of Virginia where he grew up. Most prolifically he dealt with vampires preying on wounded soldiers in the Revolutionary War. It is even said in the secret supernatural record that General Washington personally decapitated a Ghoul who was cannibalizing fallen troops! While in office he tasked various soldiers to look into the supernatural scourge. They were ordered to keep their activities secret and report directly to him.
The Wicked Witch That Nearly Destroyed The United States
Earlier in his life, he nearly fell prey to a wayward witch! Before he met his future wife Martha a beguiling witch began a romance with him. Her intent was to marry him and become the First Lady. The witches mission was to plant subtle seeds that would destroy the USA before it could ever turn into a superpower. She had to be careful not to tip off time enforcement from the future because she was, in fact, a time traveler! Ultimately her witchcraft caught the attention of Witch Slayers who dispatched her and saved Washington along with the United States! It’s not known if she was working on her own or was apart of a magical temporal conspiracy.
The Witch Defense League
The Witch Slayers who saved Washington were members of a private group called The Witch Defense League (WDL). They had their roots going all the way back to the Salem Witch Trials of the late 1600s. The organization was made Quasi-Federal by George Washington in 1791 to keep it off the official books. Very few in the Executive Branch nor Congress knew of its existence. They reported directly to Washington and his successors. Although President John Adams thought it was all a bunch of bull! The Witch Hunters League was the first precursor to today’s supernatural government juggernaut known as The US Paranormal Defense Agency. The US PDA was created from several other secret agencies in 1977 by President Jimmy Carter. Carter himself was obsessed with the supernatural ever since his past encounter with extraterrestrials!
On future federal holidays expect metaphysical material on Presidents John Adams, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, James Monroe, John Quincy Adams, Andrew Jackson (Friends without resident immortal vampire Drake Alexander), Martin Van Burn, William Henry Harrison, John Tyler, James Polk, Zachary Taylor, Millard Fillmore, Franklin Pierce, and James Buchanan.
President James Polk
President James K Polk grew up in rural North Carolina and later Tennessee. He was a particularly frail child of poor health which was a major disadvantage in a family of frontier farmers. Doctors were baffled by his condition until an eccentric backwoods Healer sensed the child suffered from a Voodoo Curse. Polk’s father Samuel owned slaves and one of them cursed his firstborn before vanishing. As the firstborn of 10 children, James bore the brunt of the Curse. Curse creators sometimes find it crueler to curse their kin so the suffering is doubled. With much effort, the Curse was reversed with the help of the Healer and a local Witch. Polk made a speedy recovery within months. The Curse was never reported in mainstream history books and a cover story of urinary stones being removed was used.
Unfortunately, Polk didn’t learn his lesson and continued to own slaves as an adult. He put forth the public persona as a benevolent slave owner but in reality, he only cared about making profits on the backs of forced free labor! It’s known that he hired cruel slave overseers and that slaves routinely fought to run away from his rule! Not long after leaving the White House, he died from cholera. Some suggest he was re-cursed for his wrongs against African-Americans.
President Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter
Honest Abraham Lincoln, 16th President Of The United States Of America, was the most prolific supernatural slayer of all the Presidents! First, and foremost he was a genuine vampire slayer. In fact, the novel, and motion picture “Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter” is based on a true story. Like Washington, he stumbled upon malevolent monsters as a child in the wild. In this case, the backwoods of Kentucky and Illinois. Lincoln bravely eliminated werewolves, wendigos, ghouls, and even a horde of zombies. It’s said he saved Kentucky from being overrun by vampires. To this day the State still has a relatively low vampire populace. Rumors of a love affair with a fairy and Lincoln possessing some level of Sasquatch DNA have yet to be confirmed.
The Ghost Of Abe Lincoln
During his tenure as President, he began greatly expanded the various secret supernatural agencies already in place. Unfortunately, he was greatly distracted by the Civil War so many of his paranormal projects were placed on the back burner and some never saw the light of day after his tragic assassination. Abraham Lincoln ended up being a perpetual ghost tied to the White House. Specifically the Lincoln Bedroom. Efforts by Ghost Busters to free him have failed. It is unknown what ties him there for sure. Many used to think he was simply trying to finish out his Presidential term in a confused ghostly state. Now some speculate a powerful Confederate Curse coupled with Lincoln’s own guilt over blood spilled in the Civil War have trapped him on Earth! New shreds of evidence indicate the bullet that killed Lincoln may have been cursed by a Gypsy hired by John Wilkes Booth!
Future Federal holidays will grant us the paranormal perplexities of Presidents Andrew Johnson, Ulysses S. Grant, Rutherford B Hayes, James A Garfield, Chester A Arthur, Benjamin Harrison, Grover Cleveland, and William McKinley.
Big Game Cryptid Hunter Theodore Roosevelt
The 26th US President Theodore Roosevelt was known for his prolific trapping and hunting of large wildlife species throughout the United States and Africa as well. He was also an expert in tracking and taxidermy. In the 1880’s he became a Cowboy in the Dakota Territory where he built his ranch. It is there he first made contact with the local Sasquatch while hunting bison. The Bigfoot had been mingling with a buffalo herd and was startled by the gun shots. It fled into the woods never to be seen again. Although, it is said random rocks were thrown at him from a long range on several occasions by an unknown assailant. The Sasquatch are known for this territory defending behavior. While ranching he dealt with Werewolves poaching livestock and even an Abominable Snowman Yeti during a blizzard. He shot the blasphemous beast in the head but it got away and most likely healed. It is beyond difficult to take down a Yeti!
Roosevelt On Supernatural Safari
Upon becoming Vice-President and later President in 1901, he was made privy to everything the United States government knew about our paranormal planet. These illuminating revelations ignited his imagination about expanding his hunting to a whole new level. However, he privately stated he drew the line at hunting vampires for sport as they appeared human. Shortly after his Presidency ended he partook of an African Safari in March 1909. There he hunted and trapped normal wildlife specimens for the Smithsonian Institution and the American Museum of Natural History. Secretly, he was also doing the same with paranormal cryptids for the US government. Roosevelt expanded the government’s knowledge of little known about African supernatural creatures. He and his safari nearly lost their lives on several occasions by the claws and mouthes of mad monsters!
The Death Of Theodore Roosevelt
Upon his death, as he slept on January 05, 1919, Roosevelt ascended to the afterlife of Heaven as confirmed by prolific psychics, seers, and mystics. Thomas Marshall, Woodrow Wilson’s Vice President, said that “Death had to take Roosevelt sleeping, for if he had been awake, there would have been a fight!” We now know that had literal meaning since Theodore fought the Grim Reaper Death himself in the astral plane after his soul left his body. His Guardian Angel eventually intervened and said all would be well if he simply went into the light. Death still holds a grudge for his insolence to this day!
Coming Soon…William Howard Taft, Woodrow Wilson, Warren G Harding, Calvin Coolidge, Herbert Hoover, Franklin D Roosevelt, Harry S Truman, Dwight D Eisenhower, and Lyndon B Johnson.
President John F Kennedy And Time Travelers
There are events in the 20th century that lure in many a time traveler from the future. One was the sinking of the Titanic that boasted some 200+ time travelers just before it sunk. Another event is the assassination of President Kennedy. While Time Cops have been rather lax when it comes to the Titanic they strictly enforce temporal incursions near John F Kennedy throughout his life. There’s an armada of decent travelers who attempt to save him or try to uncover the conspiratorial mystery of his assassination.
The Failed Attempts To Save President Kennedy
It is known that at least a few gifted psychics tried to warn President Kennedy of his fate. Although he dismissed them as quacks. The same goes for the few time travelers who managed to meet him before he was President. Just as they were about to present high-tech proof of their claims some mysterious men would quickly intervene. They would then tell Kennedy the supposed time travelers were mentally ill. Of course, once he became President and was informed of the full extent of the supernatural world, including time travelers, he began to think twice about those past incidents. In fact, it is thought he changed his plans and Dallas wasn’t his original destination on that ill-fated day on November 22nd, 1963. Especially after one time traveler managed to pose as a security credentialed official and meet with him in the Oval Office! He showed Kennedy an iPad-like device with all manner of evidence including video. It was also revealed who was behind the conspiracy to kill him. Despite this, he still met his maker way too early in life.
The Conspiracy And Travel To The Future
In the distant future, it will be known that Kennedy discovered the Deep State. A wayward web of sinister secretive individuals and organizations who actually control the US Government no matter who is elected by the people. Kennedy made efforts to disband and expose this Deep State but ultimately they took him down with Lee Harvey Oswald as the fall guy. Apparently, the President informed a number of people who continued to cause trouble in future decades with secret documents Kennedy gave them. This prompted Deep State time assassins’ to go back and take down Kennedy at age 17 while he was at boarding school in 1934. A brave troop of private time travelers saved him by bringing Kennedy to 2118. Oddly enough Time Cops chose not to confront the assassins nor the saviors.
President Kennedy Is Shocked By The 22nd Century And His Fate
The temporal assassins went to 2118 and nearly killed Kennedy. He had escaped his saviors after he freaked out about being in the future and not knowing who to trust. He ended up hanging with a group of fellow teens who attended a swanky hologram laden party. Kennedy was shocked to learn about the dark future of his family and his own alarming end. The party quickly descended into chaos as the assassins’ were finally eradicated by the time saviors. Kennedy was returned to his own time with a memory alteration procedure so he would forget everything. The fictional version of this true story was featured in the television show Timeless (Season 2: Episode 5 “The Kennedy Curse”)[Watch Online]. Often government insiders release secret info to trusted entertainment industry sources to get ahead of any potential leaks. If it already exists as fiction then people won’t believe the real story.
President Kennedy’s Afterlife Is In The 22nd Century!
It is said before Kennedy’s memory of the future was erased he requested to return upon his death. He was intrigued by the fantastical world of the early 22nd century. It is known that official time travelers are authorized to retrieve various important historical figures at the moment of their death. They are then resurrected with future medical procedures. The dead bodies are replaced with precise clones exhibiting the proper autopsy traits. The saviors had set up measures to do this but were confronted by a governmental time travel team from the 28th century with official credentials. Kennedy ended up in the 28th century where he met up with some other people from the 1960’s. This included Marylin Monroe who he was rumored to have had an affair with. He was later allowed to visit his friends in the 22nd century. Kennedy ended up finding Jackie a century later where she was brought from the past by other time travelers. They were eventually re-married. John F Kennedy eventually became President Of Earth with his re-entry into politics! Thankfully, the Deep State was no longer a threat anymore!
President Richard Nixon Thought The Supernatural World Was A Joke
President Nixon seemed to regard the supernatural world as a complete joke. So much so that he routinely broke security protocols and shared secrets with various friends and celebrities. This includes showing Jackie Gleason proof of aliens. Nixon reportedly went much further with Elvis Presley and shared virtually everything he knew! He even gave the King Of Rock And Roll a government badge that granted access to places like Area 51!
Nixon Hexed By Some Supernatural He Offended
As Vice-President, Nixon already had some knowledge of the paranormal. Once briefed on the full extent as President he just kept giggling the entire time. He would routinely refer to various entities as foolish freaks to be experimented on. Even commenting on how he’d love to conquer alien worlds and exterminate the whole lot of them! Amazingly, Nixon called the Devil himself a bumbling idiot who was too stupid to hold on to his Archangel status. He blatantly insulted an armada of powerful beings within the insulated delusion of his own Presidential power. It’s unknown who exactly hexed him to be beyond paranoid but it led him down the path to his disgrace in resignation. Oddly enough the hex might not have been necessary since Gerald Ford had struck a deal with a dark Leprechaun who in turn sent negative luck toward the Nixon Administration. Some of that bad luck bit Gerald on the rear during his own Presidency.
The Arctic Abomination
The Soviet Union secretly tested a nuclear weapon in the Arctic in October 1972. It released a prehistoric monster that has been frozen in ice for millions of years! The blasphemous beast was somewhat comparable to Godzilla! A joint US-Soviet Military force found itself helpless against the Arctic Abomination. In the Eleventh Hour supernatural forces from around the world converged to defeat the threat to the world. A threat so great that even the forces of darkness entered the fray as one-time allies. Afterward, an ungrateful Nixon said, ” It was the least those freaks could do! At least they were of some use!” Read About The Arctic Abomination…
President Gerald Ford And The Evil Leprechaun Of Dark Luck
It seems that Gerald Ford developed strong aspirations to ascend to the Presidency once he became House Minority Leader. That first taste of true power can be quite addictive to some people! Sometime during the Nixon Administration, he crossed paths with a Clurichaun, aka evil Anti-Leprechaun. These little imps often pose as Leprechauns in order to trick unsuspecting humans. It’s conjectured that the Clurichaun chose Ford because his paternal grandfather, Charles King, had made a deal with a Clurichaun to become a prominent wealthy banker. However, in that case the bad luck wasn’t passed to his son, and the biological father of Ford, Leslie King. This happens if someone is smart enough to precisely word their wish. Dark Leprechauns like to choose members of the same family in order to build a multi-generation tidal wave of bad luck to feed off of. Read The Rest Of This Story…
President Jimmy Carter Forms The US Paranormal Defense Agency
When President Jimmy Carter took office in 1977 he was beyond shocked by the existence of vampires, werewolves, zombies, witches, and all the rest! He thought extraterrestrials were the only threat. This stemmed from his own brush with UFO’s in 1969. What Jimmy didn’t share was his own abduction by aliens. He knew nobody would believe him and he didn’t want to be branded as a complete nut. Upon his first extensive Presidential medical exam, an alien probe was found and removed from his body. It’s unknown if the ET’s knew of his future Presidency and were attempting to bring the USA under their control? Some have claimed his longevity and ability to easily beat cancer might be attributed to alien DNA experimentation.
Carter promptly unified all secret supernatural agencies into the Paranormal Defense Agency under the command of the US Department Of Defense. This in an effort to efficiently combat the supernatural scourge infesting the USA. Particularly the alien menace! Some say Carter’s obsession with the supernatural led him to drop the Presidential ball causing one of the more embarrassing Presidencies of all time. Second only to Ford of course! If only the world knew that some of the blame for his stagflationary days was his obsession with protecting citizens from the forces of evil! Frightening forces he angered and who also had their hand in the downfall of his Presidency when he lost re-election to Ronald Reagan in 1980.
President Ronald Reagan Was An Experienced Supernatural Slayer!
When President Ronald Reagan took the reigns of power he wasn’t surprised when he learned about the full extent of our paranormal planet. While serving as a lifeguard in 1920’s Dixon, Illinois some of the locals called him Ronnie The Vampire Slayer and later Dutch The Destroyer! He protected his small rural community from not only vampires but also werewolves and all manner of monsters! As an Actor in Hollywood, he came across power-hungry vampire producers and other evil entities. This included the demons looking to make dark deals and buy souls in return for fame. As California Governor, Reagan was privy to the various supernatural events reported to him by the State agencies under his command. The President worked hard to strengthen the effectiveness of the US Paranormal Defense Agency during the 1980’s. Many vampire nests, zombie uprisings, and werewolf attacks were thwarted under the Reagan Administration. Also See: Ronald Reagan Is Attacked By The Abominable Snowman And Saved By Santa Claus! I know it sounds crazy but it’s all real folks!
On future Federal holidays expect the paranormal Presidencies of George Bush, Sr, Bill Clinton, George Bush Jr, and Joe Biden…
President Barack Obama
President Barack Obama was no stranger to the world of the supernatural before taking office. As a five-year-old child, he saved a Menehune from a vampire! Menehune are the Elves of Hawaii known for their fine craftsmanship. Building various structures in particular. Young Barack had wandered off playing in the tropical forest as sunset approached. He got lost and happened upon a small human life creature struggling in the arms of a man whose eyes were glowing red. His fangs sunk into the flesh of the helpless creature that turned out to be a mythical Menehune.
Only children and certain special individuals can actually see the Menehune. Had the average person happened upon the scene they would have spotted the vampire hugging something invisible in his arms. Barack was oddly calm even though he knew nothing about vampires yet had heard stories about the Menehune. The vampire was startled at the appearance of the young boy. Thankfully, the vamp was newly sired and didn’t know everything about his kind. He foolishly dropped the Menehune for what he saw as the more appetizing human target. Obama’s calm turned to terror as the beast grabbed him and bit into his neck. Unfortunately for the vampire, he knew not that the blood of young children is a poison of sorts to his kind. The blissful innocence of childhood is a type of magic not readily digestible within vampires.
The vampire was weakened and dropped Obama in agony. The Menehune led him away to safety out of the forest and utilized some type of potion to block Barack’s scent so the vampire wouldn’t come after him out of revenge. The deeply thankful Menehune promised to make Barack’s fondest wish come true. That was when he declared he wanted to be President Of The United States Of America. The Menehune have minimal wish-granting powers so the little guy had to call in various paranormal favors. It took some time before he finally finagled a deal with a Leprechaun to bring good luck upon Obama. This is why he rose to the Presidency so quickly. Only twelve years after becoming an Illinois State Senator, he was President!
President Obama had no further brushes with the supernatural and he never saw the Menehune again since he moved to Indonesia not long after that. Once in office, he was amazed by the scope of paranormal intel presented to him! This caused him to rethink the Menehune-Vampire incident that he remembered as a nightmare. He soon realized it really happened. Obama returned to explore the forest later on hoping to spot the Menehune. He saw the smiling little fella for only a split second before he abruptly vanished. To this day Barack is fully aware of what the Menehune did for him in return for saving his life.
President Donald Trump Was Approached By The Devil!
When President Trump came into office he was aware of the existence of vampires and witches. He hired witches to cast protection spells on his various properties to keep the vamps away. He also knew of various demonic entities who looked to purchase human souls. Some people in his organization had made pacts with various demons. He was even approached by the Devil himself in a human form. Satan wished to promise him the US Presidency in return for certain favors. The Devil assumed he’d play ball as a billionaire who had knowledge of the global Illuminati power structure. Trump turned him down as he was determined to achieve the most powerful post on Earth on his own.
When Trump was first briefed on the exponential extent of the supernatural world beyond vampires and demons he was seriously shocked! Especially about the existence of various extraterrestrials. It’s rumored he had major heart palpitations and had to seek medical attention. Thankfully, he accepted the horror of our reality and worked with the US Paranormal Defense Agency to strengthen supernatural defenses. Particularly various border incursions by malevolent monsters!
President Donald Trump’s Space Force
Space Force was formed under the Trump Administration due to an unknown alien threat. It seems Earth has been under the protection of the Galactic Federation of extraterrestrials since the 1950’s. Mainly the aliens are interested in the billions of unique DNA sequences our planet possesses. They also covet various other natural resources to a lesser extent. There has also been interest in watching a sapient species evolve into an intelligent civilization. All these factors compel the Galactic Federation to protect Earth from meteors, hostile aliens, and anything that could radically threaten the planet.
The Galactic Federation
They’ve been in contact with a handful of the largest governments for decades but the United States was their first contact and often the one they deal with the most. This is due to the USA’s global influence. The aliens are kept secret to prevent mass hysteria and to allow civilization to develop as naturally as possible. President Trump was informed in 2019 that a major war was raging across the Milky Way as invaders from the Andromeda Galaxy had allied with some alien factions in ours. The Galactic Federation forces were spread too thin to completely defend Earth. So they decided to finally share top-secret tech that would normally go against their Prime Directive of direct inference with a developing civilization. Space Force was formed to repel any aliens that get past the front lines of Galaxy War IV. Apparently, there have been three other Galaxy-wide wars. Mostly related to in-fighting among alien factions before they came together as the Galactic Federation.
The Current Status Of Deceased US Presidents
Top-flight psychics, seers, and mystics sense that George Washington and other Presidents ascended to Heaven upon death. However, outside of time they instantly saw the entire history of the United States and were shocked by its descent into darkness! These Presidential Ghosts often return in times of crisis and various national holidays like Presidents Day. They also meet with the living spirits of the United States known as Uncle Sam and Lady Liberty.
- The Ghosts Of The White House
- President Gerald Ford’s Dealings With A Dark Leprechaun!
- President Ronald Reagan’s Brushes With The Supernatural
- List Of Future Presidential Election Years
- US Presidential Wealth