What Role Have US Presidents Played In The Supernatural World?

Most governments back to the dawn of human civilization have been aware of the perplexing paranormal world. Mostly they’ve worked to keep its secrets from the general populace for their own benefit and to prevent panic. However, the further back in history you go the more people who knew about the supernatural and even directly participated in it! All US President’s have been briefed on the state of supernatural affairs on Earth in their particular era. Most modern Presidents had no idea so much of the paranormal was real while earlier Presidents, including the Founding Fathers, knew full well the world was a far more dangerous place than it appeared to be!

President George Washington Takes Down Monsters With His Trusty Hatchet

Our first President George Washington wasn’t just chopping down cherry trees with his hallowed hatched. Even as a child this magnificent bastard was taking down vampires, werewolves and even random zombies in the woods and fields of Virginia where he grew up. Most prolifically he dealt with vampires preying on wounded soldiers in the Revolutionary War. It is even said in the secret supernatural record that General Washington personally decapitated a Ghoul who was cannibalizing fallen troops! While in office he tasked various troops to look into the supernatural scourge. They were ordered to keep their activities secret and report directly to him.

The Wicked Witch That Nearly Destroyed The United States

Earlier in his life, he nearly fell prey to a wayward witch! Before he met his future wife Martha a beguiling witch began a romance with him. Her intent was to marry him and become the First Lady. The witches mission was to plant subtle seeds that would destroy the USA before it could ever turn into a superpower. She had to be careful not to tip off time enforcement from the future because she was, in fact, a time traveler! Ultimately her witchcraft caught the attention of Witch Slayers who dispatched her and saved Washington along with the United States! It’s not known if she was working on her own or was apart of a magical temporal conspiracy.

The Witch Defense League

The Witch Slayers who saved Washington were members of a private group called The Witch Defense League (WDL). They had their roots going all the way back to the Salem Witch Trials of the late 1600s. The organization was made Quasi-Federal by George Washington in 1791 to keep it off the official books. Very few in the Executive Branch nor Congress knew of its existence. They reported directly to Washington and his successors. Although President John Adams thought it was all a bunch of bull! The Witch Hunters League was the first precursor to today’s supernatural government juggernaut known as The US Paranormal Defense Agency. The US PDA was created from several other secret agencies in 1977 by President Jimmy Carter. Carter himself was obsessed with the supernatural ever since his past encounter with extraterrestrials!

President Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter

Honest Abraham Lincoln, 16th President Of The United States Of America, was the most prolific supernatural slayer of all the Presidents!  First, and foremost he was a genuine vampire slayer.  In fact, the novel, and motion picture “Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter” is based on a true story.  Like Washington, he stumbled upon malevolent monsters as a child in the wild. In this case, the backwoods of Kentucky and Illinois. Lincoln bravely eliminated werewolves, wendigos, ghouls, and even a horde of zombies. It’s said he saved Kentucky from being overrun by vampires. To this day the State still has a relatively low vampire populace. Rumors of a love affair with a fairy and Lincoln possessing some level of Sasquatch DNA have yet to be confirmed.

The Ghost Of Abe Lincoln

During his tenure as President, he began greatly expanded the various secret supernatural agencies already in place. Unfortunately, he was greatly distracted by the Civil War so many of his paranormal projects were placed on the back burner and some never saw the light of day after his tragic assassination. Abraham Lincoln ended up being a perpetual ghost tied to the White House. Specifically the Lincoln Bedroom. Efforts by Ghost Busters to free him have failed. It is unknown what ties him there for sure. Many used to think he was simply trying to finish out his Presidential term in a confused ghostly state. Now some speculate a powerful Confederate Curse coupled with Lincolns own guilt over blood spilled in the Civil War have trapped him on Earth! New shreds of evidence indicate the bullet that killed Lincoln may have been cursed by a Gypsy hired by John Wilkes Booth!

The Current Status Of Deceased US Presidents

Top flight psychics, seers, and mystics sense that George Washington and other Presidents ascended to Heaven upon death. However, outside of time they instantly saw the entire history of the United States and were shocked by its descent into darkness! These Presidential Ghosts often return on various national holidays like Presidents Day. They also meet with the living spirits of the United States known as Uncle Sam and Lady Liberty.

On future national holidays such as Presidents Day and Independence Day, we’ll add more information about the involvement of our Presidents in the paranormal world.

Why Was President Gerald Ford So Unlucky?

Gerald Ford Historic Trip And Fall

Gerald’s most historic trip & fall episode on the steps of Air Force One. His wife Betty looks on as if it’s an everyday occurrence.

Gerald Ford was an Eagle Scout, and star athlete in his youth. He served bravely in the Navy during World War II, and won his first election into the House Of Representatives in 1948. Ford eventually rose to House Minority Leader before Richard Nixon nominated him Vice-President in 1973. Finally upon Nixon’s resignation he became President Of The United States. Despite this life of successes Ford eventually fell prey to the specter of dark luck in his Presidency as he suddenly became known for being a clumsy oaf. His Presidency was marked with repeated tripping, and stumbling all over the place along with moments of awkwardness, and silly inexplicable blunders. The only unelected President in history lost his first election to Jimmy Carter in 1976. So why did Gerald Ford’s luck change so drastically during the 70’s?

It seems he developed strong aspirations to ascend to the Presidency once he became House Minority Leader. Sometime during the Nixon Administration he
crossed paths with a Clurichaun, aka evil Anti-Leprechauns, who often pose as Leprechauns in order to trick unsuspecting humans.  It’s conjectured that the Clurichaun chose Ford because his paternal grandfather, Charles King, had made a deal with a Clurichaun to become a prominent wealthy banker.   However in that case the bad luck was passed to his son, and the biological father of Ford, Leslie King.  This happens if someone is smart enough to precisely word their wish.  They might escape the dark luck but then it gets inadvertently passed down to their eldest child.  Dark Leprechauns like to choose members of the same family in order to build a multi-generation tidal wave of bad luck to feed off of.

The Clurichaun claiming to be a Leprechaun approached Ford in the US Capital after a late night session in the House. He made Gerald an offer he
couldn’t refuse!  He would become President at the expense of Nixon’s downfall.  Gerald felt bad about this but wanted the Presidency with all his heart.  He’d later pardon Nixon out of guilt.  Gerald agreed to the deal without realizing that bad luck always comes with a Clurichaun deal.  Ford’s deal resulted in Nixon, and others in the administration receiving the negative luck of the Watergate Scandal.  In 1973 Ford was appointed Vice-President in place of Spiro Agnew, and in 1974 he became President when Nixon resigned under threat of impeachment.  Upon taking the oath of office President Gerald Ford’s bad luck spree began.  A specter of dumb dark embarrassing luck that would follow him for all the rest of his days even beyond The White House.  Gerald Ford should be thankful he didn’t wish for anything dastardly because such wishes can result in dangerous dark luck rather than the harmless embarrassments he suffered through. Let this be a lesson to those who blindly accept deals from little Irish fellows calling themselves Leprechauns.

A sure way to know you’re dealing with a Clurichaun is the fact that real Leprechauns are shy, and secretive. They’ll never approach anyone to make a deal, or grant wishes.  Also real four leaf clovers, lucky charms, and various religious artifacts will repel dark diabolical Leprechauns of doom!

One Of Many Examples Of President Gerald Ford’s Bad Clurichaun Luck