Gerald’s most historic trip & fall episode on the steps of Air Force One. His wife Betty looks on as if it’s an everyday occurrence.
President Gerald Ford was an Eagle Scout, and star athlete in his youth. He served bravely in the Navy during World War II and won his first election into the House Of Representatives in 1948. Ford eventually rose to House Minority Leader before Richard Nixon nominated him Vice-President in 1973. Finally, upon Nixon’s resignation, he became President Of The United States. Despite this life of successes Ford eventually fell prey to the specter of dark luck in his Presidency as he suddenly became known for being a clumsy oaf. His Presidency was marked with repeated tripping, and stumbling all over the place. There were also inexplicable moments of awkwardness and silly inexplicable blunders. The only unelected President in history lost his first election to Jimmy Carter in 1976. So why did Gerald Ford’s luck change so drastically during the 70’s?
The Specter Of Dark Luck Visits Gerald Ford
It seems that Gerald developed strong aspirations to ascend to the Presidency once he became House Minority Leader. That first taste of true power can be quite addictive to some people! Sometime during the Nixon Administration, he crossed paths with a Clurichaun, aka evil Anti-Leprechaun. These little imps often pose as Leprechauns in order to trick unsuspecting humans. It’s conjectured that the Clurichaun chose Ford because his paternal grandfather, Charles King, had made a deal with a Clurichaun to become a prominent wealthy banker. However in that case the bad luck was passed to his son, and the biological father of Ford, Leslie King. This happens if someone is smart enough to precisely word their wish. They might escape the dark luck but then it gets inadvertently passed down to their eldest child. Dark Leprechauns like to choose members of the same family in order to build a multi-generation tidal wave of bad luck to feed off of.
An Evil Leprechaun Tricks Ford!
The Clurichaun, claiming to be a Leprechaun, approached Ford in the US Capitol after a late-night session in the House. He made Gerald an offer he couldn’t refuse! Ford would become President at the expense of Nixon’s downfall. Gerald felt bad about this but wanted the Presidency with all his heart. He’d later pardon Nixon out of guilt. Gerald agreed to the deal without realizing that bad luck always comes with a Clurichaun deal. Ford’s dirty deal resulted in Nixon, and others in the administration receiving the negative luck of the Watergate Scandal. In 1973 Ford was appointed Vice-President in place of Spiro Agnew, and in 1974 he became President when Nixon resigned under threat of impeachment.
The Unfortunate Embarrassment Spree
Upon taking the oath of office President Gerald Ford’s bad luck spree began. A specter of dumb dark embarrassing luck that would follow him for all the rest of his days even beyond The White House. The grandest example being the historic tumble down the steps of Air Force One. Gerald Ford should be thankful he didn’t wish for anything dastardly because such wishes can result in dangerous dark luck rather than the harmless embarrassments he suffered through. In addition, a great deal of the failed fortune fell upon the Nixon Administration thus lessening the full brunt on Ford. Let this be a lesson to those who blindly accept deals from little Irish fellows calling themselves Leprechauns.
How To Tell The Difference Between A Leprechaun And A Clurichaun
A sure way to know you’re dealing with a Clurichaun is the fact that real Leprechauns are shy and secretive. They’ll never approach anyone to make a deal or grant wishes. Also, real four-leaf clovers, lucky charms, and various religious artifacts will repel dark diabolical Leprechauns of doom! Sometimes their eyes can give them away. You can just see the evil whereas a Leprechaun will have more innocent child-like eyes. That is unless you anger them by stealing their pot of gold or capturing them.
One Of Many Examples Of President Gerald Ford’s Bad Clurichaun Luck
There have been rumors swirling about supernatural circles that the Devil claims a soul lost amid Daylight Savings Time. This occurs in various nations around the world but for reasons unknown, the United States is the Devil’s favorite target. Every year in the USA on the second Sunday in March Americans are required to set their clocks an hour ahead at 2 AM. This sets time squarely in the 3 AM Devils Hour. Legend has it that lost hour becomes metaphysical temporal energy the Devil and some other entities are said to collect. As the enchanted energies are collected it creates a supernatural net that captures a soul at the wrong place in the wrong time! Their body and soul go to Hell until the end of Daylight Savings Time on the first Sunday in November. Unfortunately, it is said they return as a lost soulless creature while their spirit remains in Hell until they die as they were naturally intended. Of course, by then their tortured soul is deeply damaged!
A Human Soul Is Lost To The Missing Daylight Saving Hour!
Our extensive research into this insane urban legend has led us to believe it is indeed true! Each year one person goes missing on March Daylight Savings Sunday and reappears at the end of November. Family and friends say the victim can’t remember where they’ve been. They are beyond apathetic and seemingly emotionless. Once warm and loving individuals return as cold zombies just going through the motions. However, they often awake with screaming night terrors as their sub-conscious relives the horrifying hell they suffered. Apparently, the Devil treats them as an honored guest of Hell one moment and then lets his demons have their way with them the next! It’s thought that the innocent soul is eventually traded for a Demon captured by Heaven. Although as mentioned the soul exchange doesn’t happen until the person’s body has died on Earth.
The Daylight Savings Time Devil’s Hour Trap
The metaphysical mechanisms that facilitate this temporal soul capturing net are tied into the human collective consciousness that dictates what numerical time it actually is. The lost 2 AM hour lives on as an elusive entity in the minds of humankind as we jump to 3 AM. During this instantaneous time jump, an unconscious metaphysical energized spirit for the non-existent 2 AM hour is created. For an instant, it is spread across any given time zone like an invisible net. The 3 AM Devil’s Hour hits and it is spiritually anchored to a random Underworld portal in the region. The Underworld is the physical connection to metaphysical Hell. At 3 AM the two o’clock hour astral net is pulled into the paranormal portal. The soul nearest to the portal gets caught in the increasingly concentrated net and is dragged into the Underworld all the way to Hell! It never captures more than one soul because the power of the Human soul is off the supernatural scales. It’s simply too much for the net to maintain more than one. The body itself is transmuted into a temporary metaphysical form as well.
The Lucky Daylight Savings Break For A Vampire
Oddly enough the net would be more likely to attract a demonic soul to it. However such beings on Earth are rare compared to humans. There is an anecdote of a vampire being dragged to Hell one year. Apparently, he had the time of his life and came back to brag how he was in tight with the Devil. In fact, he left as a fourth generation vampire and was powered up like a first generation vamp upon his return. He’s now a high-level minion for the royal Transylvanian vampires! It’s good to know that there is sometimes a silver lining to this temporal atrocity!😈
It was the Witching Hour of Halloween when a serial killer wielding an extra-large meat cleaver entered a 24-7 department store. The deranged individual then eradicated two 3rd shift employees stocking shelves in Aisle 13! Interestingly enough Aisle 13 was for seasonal items. In this case, it was being stocked with the last of the Halloween Costumes and Decor they had left in their warehouse. The crazy killer grabbed a random monster mask and placed it over his face while laughing like a loon. He then proceeded to slice, and dice the man, and woman up while arranging the body parts around a Satanic symbol he painted in the victim’s blood. At the Devil’s Hour, the police arrived to find him drenched in blood while chanting incantations in an unknown ancient language. He ignored them at first but once they neared him he ripped his mask off to reveal a sinister scowl so devoid of humanity that it caused the police to freeze for a few seconds! The murderer then leaped forth screaming,” Don’t interfere with my masters ritual!” He brandished his meat cleaver, and the cops were forced to shoot him in self-defense. He collapsed and died amid the bloody carnage of his innocent slain victims.
The Haunting Of Aisle 13
For two weeks the aisle was closed off with crime scene tape for forensic investigation, and clean-up. Almost immediately after Aisle 13 was opened to the general public weird occurrences began to take place. Things would fall off the shelves, eerie screams bellowed beyond from thin air, noxious odors emanated onward, small fires would start for no reason, and people were constantly being hurt by random accidents. Store management decided to renumber the aisles without admitting to themselves that the area was haunted since that would be insane in their logical eyes. So it became Aisle 14 but this didn’t fool the diabolical darkness that had descended densely down the shelf lined lane. Read The Rest Of This Urban Legend On Our Halloween Blog…