The Patriot Woman Urban Legend


Out of the tragedy of the World Trade Center terrorist attacks on September 11th, 2001 came a glimmer of superhero hope! Of course, we know of the various special people who develop powers from gamma radiation such as the notorious Hulks. The Japanese Fukushima Disaster created an unprecedented amount of Incredible Hulks that required the government to set forth great effort to cover it up and suppress media coverage.  Most humans develop cancer from radiation but some with the right paranormal genetics develop psychokinetic powers. To a lesser extent various carcinogens and toxic material that aren’t necessarily radioactive can activate latent powers hidden within our junk DNA.

The One In A Billion Superpower Jackpot!

After the destruction of the World Trade Center, a toxic dust cloud blanketed New York City with perilous particulate. The ruble of the Twin Towers continued to burn perplexing pollutants into the air for months afterward. There were numerous cases of various illnesses and cancer from those near ground zero of the dastardly disaster.  This was especially true when it came to First Responders and heroes who selflessly risked their own lives to save others. In the case of one lucky woman, breathing in the potentially deadly debris netted her some totally titanic powers!

Patriot Woman Is Born From Ashes Of Destructive Despair

We don’t know her real name due to her secretive nature. We only know that she calls herself Patriot Woman in honor of September 11th Patriot Day. Humans with powers and sapient supernatural creatures generally strive to keep a low profile. Naturally, they want to avoid being the subject of capture and experimentation by the government, or private rogue organizations. Those who are aware of the Supernatural Secrecy Pact are also quite vigilant to avoid mass public exposure of their abilities for fear of incurring the higher dimensional consequences of their actions. If they aren’t aware it’s not uncommon for someone in the paranormal community to pay them a visit!

On September 11th, 2001 Patriot Woman was actually a wheelchair bound 82 year old born in 1919.  She had bravely served as a nurse in the European battles of World War II against Hitler’s Germany.  Unfortunately, some stray bullets of cowardice paralyzed her from the waist down while she attempted to single-handedly save a soldiers life.  She was never able to walk again until 2001. Read The Rest Of This Urban Legend On Our Halloween Blog…

Who Is The Cringe?

There Are Beauty & Beasts In The Eye Of The Beholder. For All The Cringe Is Deadly Disturbing!

Just as someone can be born with perfect facial features thereby making them a perfect 10 so can someone be born a 1. Of course, ultimately beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Certainly, a warm smile and sensual ebullient personality can greatly increase one’s attractiveness. That being said there is a certain ratio of facial features that don’t necessarily make a person either ugly or hot. Yet at the same time, there is something off-putting about them. Not any discernible deformity but just a characteristic that is not quite human on what is clearly a human face. Some that induce a spine-chilling feeling and a wish to flee away from said individual. They are a walking Cringe!

The Cringe Loves Posing As A Creepy Clown

There is one man on Earth who is the complete embodiment of instilling a deeply disturbing feeling within all who lay eyes upon him. He is only known as The Cringe for his real name and origin are unknown. Clowns are known for creating a feeling of fear through their insane make-up. The Cringe accomplishes this without cosmetics yet he doesn’t look like a classic clown. Ironically he often works as a clown to get close to people and perform his despicable acts upon them. In full costume, he actually looks better! Some say he resembles Pennywise The Clown from the movie “It“. Although Pennywise looks like a charming bachelor compared to The Cringe.

Once the crazy clown traps his victims he cleans off his greasepaint to reveal his true cringe-worthy face. This is for maximum terror and the enjoyment of witnessing a frenzied fear from his hostages! His freakish face is said to cause a person to freeze like they would in a nightmare. The eyes of this terrifying nut look as if they are piercing your very soul with a dark dagger! It’s possible the reaction to his face could very well be a paranormal phenomenon. However, there is still research that needs to be done in order to verify this.

A Seriously Superhuman Serial Killer Of Small Stature

The Cringe is a serial killer who enjoys torturing his victims amid his unspeakable acts before murdering them! Clearly, his childhood was most like quite a horrifying mess to create such a heinous killer! The Cringe is considered Superhuman due to the enhanced strength, speed, agility, and senses he possesses. Much more than the standard serial killer! This despite his skinny build and height of 5′ 4″. Perhaps there’s a Napoleon Complex that may have had some minor part in his murderous ways along with his appearance. It is unknown where his power emanates. Plausibly it could be pure anger driven will like other serial killers. In the case of The Cringe, he may have inadvertently activated some latent superhuman DNA. With each passing decade, there is a slight increase in humans born with various superpowers.

His raw rage-filled power has been witnessed by the paranormal investigative crime fighters who have confronted him. Often they die or The Cringe eludes them! Despite pleas from some in the supernatural community the world of law enforcement seems to shrug off The Cringe as an Urban Legend due to a complete lack of evidence. He is a master of wiping a crime scene clean and completely destroying the bodies. He may also frame someone else for it. This suggests some manner of extensive training in Forensic Science.

The Cringe Walks Alone Killing All Who Cross His Path!

The Cringe is such an insanely savage loner that he has killed those who approached him to act as a hitman or enforcer for their criminal syndicate or sinister supernatural organization. He has literally turned down millions of dollars and caused multiple bounties to be placed on his head. The Cringe even make the Top Paranormal Most Wanted at number 14! However, his reputation precedes him and he is beyond difficult to find so most don’t bother hunting him! He even refused to the join the premier demonic clown cult on Earth known as The Klaus Kane Clown Cult. This freakish fool now has these demon backed clowns after him and he takes them out with extreme prejudice when they get in his way!

Beware Because The Cringe Could Be Anywhere You Are Now!

There is no supernatural method of repelling The Cringe except via brute force weaponry. He could be any clown at a circus, carnival, or child’s birthday party! He could also be any creep in a crowd where he often wears hats, sunglasses, and even fake facial hair. This is an attempt to hide his cringey appearance that would draw a lot of unwanted attention! He is said to give off a generally creepy vibe even when his back is turned to someone. His voice is also oddly shrill and gives the feeling of fingernails scratching on a chalkboard. If you come across any stranger who creeps you out in any way then don’t hesitate to simply leave the vicinity or run if they begin chasing you. Coming up with a legitimate excuse to leave might be the best option before quickly finding an area with lots of people present. Be advised he has successfully snatched people in crowded public areas in broad daylight. These unlucky folks were never seen again!

The Cringe May Have A Resistance To Magic

Don’t take a chance because it could be The Cringe! If you think you’ve had contact with The Cringe then call your nearest paranormal professionals or Practitioners Of Magic! The closest anyone came to capturing him was a witch some years ago. She thwarted his attempt to kidnap a set of twin toddlers from their parents! The witch said somehow The Cringe resisted the full metaphysical force of her marvelous magics. Plausibly via die-hard will power! Don’t try to capture or kill him on your own! He is strong, stealthy, highly intelligent, a master of hand to hand combat and is proficient in the use of all manner of weapons! When you close your eyes and think of him you will feel The Cringe surge through you as just being on the same planet as him is a horrifying prospect!

Is The Incredible Hulk Real?

Yes, Hulks are real supernatural creatures that are human most of time until triggered by anger or other heightened emotional states. The Hulks are of immense size with insanely mammoth muscles. They resemble Neanderthal’s with a more menacing monstrous appearance! And of course they’re almost always green in color. These monsters are fueled by rage that can cause them to go on damaging rampages! Thankfully, there is a glimmer of their human persona that often prevents major harm coming to innocent people. Once a rare paranormal find, the Chernobyl, and Japanese Fukushima Nuclear Disasters created an unprecedented quantity of new Hulks. Stories specific to the comic book, television, and motion picture versions of the Incredible Hulk are fictional but most likely exist in Parallel Universes.☢️

The Gamma Fueled Hulk Gene

Gamma Radiation exposure creates future Hulks!

Incredible Hulks form when a human with the Hulk Gene comes into contact with massive doses of Gamma Radiation. Obviously, most humans would get radiation sickness and die when exposed to gamma rays. The precursor to the Hulk Gene had its origin in the inter-species mating between modern humans and Neanderthals. The latent gene came to fruition when it was exposed to gamma radiation for the first time. Most likely in the 8th century when a Near Earth Supernova sent forth a massive gamma radiation burst. It’s possible someone with the precursor gene could have been exposed to gamma rays before this. However, the first recorded Hulks are from the late 700’s AD. Cryptozoologists also have ample evidence to link most modern Incredible Hulk genes to this time frame.

The Nuclear Beast

Those unfortunate souls who have their Hulk Genes activated are usually the result of unintended incidents. Accidents at nuclear power plants, scientific research facilities, and ground zero nuclear blasts bring about the metamorphosis of human into a gargantuan green Hulk. The green hulk is the most common form but they can also be other colors including gray, red, gold, blue, purple, and black due to varying factors.  A rare few even manage to retain their natural skin color. No matter what they look like they are deeply dangerous monsters who operate on instinct. When deeply angered they can become powerful enough to take down a Bigfoot and even a Werewolf with extreme prejudice! It’s even said the most powerful vampires head for the hills if a Hulk roars forth! This is why various governments and clandestine organizations have been searching for people with the Hulk Gene.They want to harness the awesome rage-filled power that lies within for military applications and nefarious purposes.

The Immense Indestructible Incredible Hulk!

A Hulk bench presses a Sasquatch preparing to launch him across a lake!

The Hulk is considered the pinnacle of biological supernatural strength and indestructibility due to the sheer maximum density of muscular cellular structures. It’s said that strength wise the Hulk is potentially the apex predator of the planet putting all creaturea paranormal or otherwise to shame! Incredible Hulks also have deeply enhanced speed, agility, and senses. An average Hulk can grow anywhere from seven to nine feet tall with weight in the one ton range within seconds of metamorphic triggering. That triggering is of course anger and in some cases deep fright.  Once heightened emotional states have subsided the creature will de-transform back to human just as quickly. The massive transformation, fueled by the gamma radiation laden Hulk Gene, and its link to metaphysical energy, creates exponential paranormal cellular growth. That is why glowing green eyes are witnessed during the metamorphosis. The journey back to human however causes a shedding of cells not seen in entertainment versions of the Incredible Hulk.  When a Hulk returns to a human state they will find themselves lying in a perplexing pool of green cellular goo!  Ewwwww!🤮

The Human Hulk

In human form, a Hulk is invulnerable to radiation and will never get cancer. They will have somewhat enhanced strength, speed, agility, and senses in the same way Werewolves do in their human state. That increases with heightened emotions just on the verge of causing full on transformation. When the eyes begin glowing there’s no going back! Hulks in a human state will have moderately developed muscles without exercising unlike the David and Bruce Banner of fictional fame. They can easily become body builders with minimal weight training. Their appetites are often double that of normal humans which compels them to consume six meals a day! Their naturally fast metabolisms gladly welcome high quantities of protein! If you see someone totally pigging out and they’re in good shape then you may have a Hulk on your hands. You will never see an overweight Hulk.

Hulks Gone Wild!

Both males and females can be Incredible Hulks. Interestingly enough, transformed female Hulks appear more human with less muscle mass and a softening of broad facial features. This is thought to be caused by some interaction between the two X Chromosomes and estrogen hormones working in concert with the Hulk Gene. Another overlooked fact is that all Hulks are completely naked unless they take special countermeasures in advance. I don’t care how strong their denim pants are. Those things are ripping off along with the underwear and bras!  It’s the same principle as a Werewolf transformation. You don’t usually see Werewolves running around with a pair of torn pants on. LOL! Naturally, entertainment media incarnations of the Hulk must have them wearing torn clothes for censorship purposes. When attempting to capture and contain Hulks, supernatural hunters often look the other way as it can be quite distracting!

The Big Green Anger Machine!

When in a complete rage the Hulk is more or less like a dangerous animal. As it calms a bit aspects of its human personality will forge forth, and they will have at least a child like comprehension of right, and wrong.  Generally, if a person or something else triggered the transformation that will be the object of the hulks destructive tendencies. They are generally driven by pure instinct and the last thoughts and events of their human self before transmuting to Hulk. This can be rather convenient for people who hulk out with a mission in mind. It can be easily completed inadvertently by the Hulk as it is sub-consciously driven by the human persona.

Controlling Incredible Hulk Transformations

Like Werewolves and other Therianthropes, Hulks can eventually learn to control their transformations over time so that they may instantly hulk out at will. Some may even be able to maintain some level of human consciousness instead of being pushed into the back of their minds in an unconscious state with no memory of their hulkishness.  After many years of practice they could have complete memory of what happened as a back seat observer similar to split personalities not active at the moment. Others might achieve real control over their Hulk, and utter simple words, and catchphrases such as “Hulk Smash!” Most of the time Hulks emit ear-splitting echoing roars that make a Lion, Werewolf and Sasquatch sound like a squeaky mouse.

Incredibly Indestructible But Not Immortal

Hulks are not immortal despite the amazing cellular growth of their transformations.  The deteriorated telomere, the hallmark of aging, is not regenerated but it does deteriorate far less than standard humans. In addition, some general cell damage, illnesses, and toxins are remedied during hulk outs. Bone breaks and even paralysis will heal completely after a few transformations. Due to this they can live an extremely long time, look young, and remain active at a very old age. It’s plausible for a Hulk to live for 200 years or more! The Hulks physical age is based on the human’s age while the Hulk itself never ages. Theoretically if someone was permanently in Hulk form they would probably be immortal. A higher frequency of transformations equals a slower aging process.  Also, continued exposure to gamma radiation increases life expectancy and strength as well. Keeping some Uranium around the house never hurt a Hulk!

The Father Of Modern Hulks: Axel Emerson

Hulks were virtually unheard of before the Nuclear Age of the 20th century. The first recorded Hulk of modern times was a scientist named Axel Emerson. He was studying gamma rays in a US government lab in 1927. Axel accidentally overdosed on radiation and transformed into a Hulk. The first transformation always occurs upon radiation exposure and complete activation of the Hulk Gene whether the subject was angry or not. He destroyed the lab and killed two members of the staff including an armed guard whose rifle was useless against the huge green behemoth. The bullets bounced right off barely leaving any scratches! Several others in the research facility suffered major to minor injuries.

Axel Hulk Lives!

Axel escaped and actually came back to work the next day since he had no memory of what happened. He was quickly detained by military personnel who told him what happened. Silent film footage of some of his destruction was witnessed and he suddenly became deeply agitated causing another Hulk out. This time he crashed through the wall and ran away. Over the past century, there have been unconfirmed sightings of his human, and Hulk self.  He is still on the US Paranormal Defense Agencies Top 100 Most Wanted List (Top 10). The agency also actively covers up all public exposure incidents of anyone on a Hulk rampage.  At least a handful of times supposed Earthquake destruction was actually a Hulk going nuts!

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The Lonely Life Of Hulks On The Run

Many Hulks end up living a nomadic life moving from town to town taking up odd jobs and helping out the weak in a quest to find a purpose in life. They may look for redemption if they accidentally harmed or killed someone while being a heinous hulk! Some even hope to find a cure but none have found one. They’re also on the run from the government, paranormal investigators, and supernatural hunters who wish to unlock their genetic secrets or simply eradicate them. They fear hurting innocent people and are reluctant to forge close relationships. Only those who truly gain control over their alter ego might dare settle down and raise a family. At least one of their children is likely to possess the Hulk Gene but all will be well so as long as they steer clear of those pesky gamma rays. Those who are evil humans are the most dangerous in Hulk form. They are the ones who appear the most monstrous!

Learn The Secrets Of Magic Spells From Real Witches!

The Supernatural World Fails To Cure Hulks!

Those Hulks who stumble upon the complete paranormal world have tried working with witches, warlocks, wizards, and sorcerers to cure them of their plight. No magic seems to be a match for the Hulk Gene. Any magical intervention causes the blasphemous beast to appear with a vengeance! Some have attempted to trade their Hulk in for another supernatural being. There are those who tried becoming vampires, werewolves, and a number of other supernatural creatures but such experiments have failed. It seems even the powerful demonic based Vampire, and Lycanthrope virus dies in a Hulks body whether in human or Hulk form. There’s no record of Vampire or Werewolf Hulks. In addition, Hulks are immune to the Zombie Virus.

The Magic Of Marvelous Manifestation!

Are Hulks The Cure For Vampirism And Lycanthropy?

That being said a non-activated Hulk never exposed to gamma rays can become a vampire, werewolf, and zombie yet upon exposure to radiation their Hulk Gene cures them of those conditions and they become pure Hulk. This is another reason Cryptozoologists want to study the Hulk since it could be a cure for the zombie virus, and other former humans afflicted by metaphysical maladies. Despite this Hulks with psychokinetic powers activated will still possess them in human form while not in Hulk form unless they have maintained some level of their human consciousness.

Master The Magic Of Astral Projection!

How To Contain An Incredible Hulk

If you spot a Hulk we recommend staying calm and still to prevent further rampages of death and destruction! Dropping to the fetal position and playing dead is the best defense. Hulks like live subjects to throw and bat around like rag dolls. Do not make eye contact!  Do not run away!  Do not wield a weapon and certainly do not shoot a gun!  You will only anger it further which fuels more strength within. Currently, there is no known method of repellent or extermination for a Hulk. Hulk Hunters use a wide array of weapons and countermeasures that would be lethal to most entities but not the Hulk. If they manage to capture one it is often held in a Graphene and Titanium cage with Hydroxy Gas which is said to aid in neutralizing gamma radiation.

Aaliyah Abebe: Master Hulk Hunter!

Miss Abebe, Hulk Hunter Extraordinaire, goes anywhere a Hulk threatens humankind!

The most famous Hulk Hunter is Aaliyah Abebe from Kenya, Africa. She has the rare power of Radiokinesis, aka the manipulation of radiation. Aaliyah is able to absorb the gamma rays infused within the Hulk and de-transform them back into a human state with a 93% success rate! She must remain within a certain distance to keep the Hulk from coming back. She has experimented with repeatedly using her power on Hulk subjects but has yet to permanently cure one. The most famous experiment had her suppress gamma rays while a Cryptozoologist attempted to isolate and destroy the Hulk Gene. Inexplicably, the subject woke up from anesthesia and hulked out beyond Aaliyah’s control leaving a severe path of destruction in its wake!  Thankfully Aaliyah, and her team,The Abebe Alliance, were able to re-contain the Hulk! Naturally, Aaliyah and her hunters are in high demand wherever a hulk manifests. Unfortunately she doesn’t have mad teleportation skills and it takes time to globe trot to any given disaster.  If you’ve seen a Hulk or suspect someone is a Hulk please contact your nearest private paranormal professional ASAP!🤢

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