Is The Incredible Hulk Real?

Yes, Hulks are real supernatural creatures that are human most of time until triggered by anger or other heightened emotional states. The Hulks are of immense size with insanely mammoth muscles. They resemble Neanderthal’s with a more menacing monstrous appearance! And of course they’re almost always green in color. These monsters are fueled by rage that can cause them to go on damaging rampages! Thankfully, there is a glimmer of their human persona that often prevents major harm coming to innocent people. Once a rare paranormal find, the Chernobyl, and¬†Japanese Fukushima Nuclear Disasters created an unprecedented quantity of new Hulks. Stories specific to the comic book, television, and motion picture versions of the Incredible Hulk are fictional but most likely exist in Parallel Universes.‚ėĘÔłŹ

The Gamma Fueled Hulk Gene

Gamma Radiation exposure creates future Hulks!

Incredible Hulks form when a human with the Hulk Gene comes into contact with massive doses of Gamma Radiation. Obviously, most humans would get radiation sickness and die when exposed to gamma rays. The precursor to the Hulk Gene had its origin in the inter-species mating between modern humans and Neanderthals. The latent gene came to fruition when it was exposed to gamma radiation for the first time. Most likely in the 8th century when a Near Earth Supernova sent forth a massive gamma radiation burst. It’s possible someone with the precursor gene could have been exposed to gamma rays before this. However, the first recorded Hulks are from the late 700’s AD. Cryptozoologists also have ample evidence to link most modern Incredible Hulk genes to this time frame.

The Nuclear Beast

Those unfortunate souls who have their Hulk Genes activated are usually the result of unintended incidents. Accidents at nuclear power plants, scientific research facilities, and ground zero nuclear blasts bring about the metamorphosis of human into a gargantuan green Hulk. The green hulk is the most common form but they can also be other colors including gray, red, gold, blue, purple, and black due to varying factors.¬† A rare few even manage to retain their natural skin color. No matter what they look like they are deeply dangerous monsters who operate on instinct. When deeply angered they can become powerful enough to take down a Bigfoot and even a Werewolf with extreme prejudice! It’s even said the most powerful vampires head for the hills if a Hulk roars forth! This is why various governments and clandestine organizations have been searching for people with the Hulk Gene.They want to harness the awesome rage-filled power that lies within for military applications and nefarious purposes.

The Immense Indestructible Incredible Hulk!

A Hulk bench presses a Sasquatch preparing to launch him across a lake!

The Hulk is considered the pinnacle of biological supernatural strength and indestructibility due to the sheer maximum density of muscular cellular structures. It’s said that strength wise the Hulk is potentially the apex predator of the planet putting all creaturea paranormal or otherwise to shame! Incredible Hulks also have deeply enhanced speed, agility, and senses. An average Hulk can grow anywhere from seven to nine feet tall with weight in the one ton range within seconds of metamorphic triggering. That triggering is of course anger and in some cases deep fright.¬† Once heightened emotional states have subsided the creature will de-transform back to human just as quickly. The massive transformation, fueled by the gamma radiation laden Hulk Gene, and its link to metaphysical energy, creates exponential paranormal cellular growth. That is why glowing green eyes are witnessed during the metamorphosis. The journey back to human however causes a shedding of cells not seen in entertainment versions of the Incredible Hulk.¬† When a Hulk returns to a human state they will find themselves lying in a perplexing pool of green cellular goo!¬† Ewwwww!ūü§ģ

The Human Hulk

In human form, a Hulk is invulnerable to radiation and will never get cancer. They will have somewhat enhanced strength, speed, agility, and senses in the same way Werewolves do in their human state. That increases with heightened emotions just on the verge of causing full on transformation. When the eyes begin glowing there’s no going back! Hulks in a human state will have moderately developed muscles without exercising unlike the David and Bruce Banner of fictional fame. They can easily become body builders with minimal weight training. Their appetites are often double that of normal humans which compels them to consume six meals a day! Their naturally fast metabolisms gladly welcome high quantities of protein! If you see someone totally pigging out and they’re in good shape then you may have a Hulk on your hands. You will never see an overweight Hulk.

Hulks Gone Wild!

Both males and females can be Incredible Hulks. Interestingly enough, transformed female Hulks appear more human with less muscle mass and a softening of broad facial features. This is thought to be caused by some interaction between the two X Chromosomes and estrogen hormones working in concert with the Hulk Gene. Another overlooked fact is that all Hulks are completely naked unless they take special countermeasures in advance. I don’t care how strong their denim pants are. Those things are ripping off along with the underwear and bras!¬† It’s the same principle as a Werewolf transformation. You don’t usually see Werewolves running around with a pair of torn pants on. LOL! Naturally, entertainment media incarnations of the Hulk must have them wearing torn clothes for censorship purposes. When attempting to capture and contain Hulks, supernatural hunters often look the other way as it can be quite distracting!

The Big Green Anger Machine!

When in a complete rage the Hulk is more or less like a dangerous animal. As it calms a bit aspects of its human personality will forge forth, and they will have at least a child like comprehension of right, and wrong.  Generally, if a person or something else triggered the transformation that will be the object of the hulks destructive tendencies. They are generally driven by pure instinct and the last thoughts and events of their human self before transmuting to Hulk. This can be rather convenient for people who hulk out with a mission in mind. It can be easily completed inadvertently by the Hulk as it is sub-consciously driven by the human persona.

Controlling Incredible Hulk Transformations

Like Werewolves and other Therianthropes, Hulks can eventually learn to control their transformations over time so that they may instantly hulk out at will. Some may even be able to maintain some level of human consciousness instead of being pushed into the back of their minds in an unconscious state with no memory of their hulkishness.¬† After many years of practice they could have complete memory of what happened as a back seat observer similar to split personalities not active at the moment. Others might achieve real control over their Hulk, and utter simple words, and catchphrases such as “Hulk Smash!” Most of the time Hulks emit ear-splitting echoing roars that make a Lion, Werewolf and Sasquatch sound like a squeaky mouse.

Incredibly Indestructible But Not Immortal

Hulks are not immortal despite the amazing cellular growth of their transformations.¬† The deteriorated telomere, the hallmark of aging, is not regenerated but it does deteriorate far less than standard humans. In addition, some general cell damage, illnesses, and toxins are remedied during hulk outs. Bone breaks and even paralysis will heal completely after a few transformations. Due to this they can live an extremely long time, look young, and remain active at a very old age. It’s plausible for a Hulk to live for 200 years or more! The Hulks physical age is based on the human’s age while the Hulk itself never ages. Theoretically if someone was permanently in Hulk form they would probably be immortal. A higher frequency of transformations equals a slower aging process.¬† Also, continued exposure to gamma radiation increases life expectancy and strength as well. Keeping some Uranium around the house never hurt a Hulk!

The Father Of Modern Hulks: Axel Emerson

Hulks were virtually unheard of before the Nuclear Age of the 20th century. The first recorded Hulk of modern times was a scientist named Axel Emerson. He was studying gamma rays in a US government lab in 1927. Axel accidentally overdosed on radiation and transformed into a Hulk. The first transformation always occurs upon radiation exposure and complete activation of the Hulk Gene whether the subject was angry or not. He destroyed the lab and killed two members of the staff including an armed guard whose rifle was useless against the huge green behemoth. The bullets bounced right off barely leaving any scratches! Several others in the research facility suffered major to minor injuries.

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Axel Hulk Lives!

Axel escaped and actually came back to work the next day since he had no memory of what happened. He was quickly detained by military personnel who told him what happened. Silent film footage of some of his destruction was witnessed and he suddenly became deeply agitated causing another Hulk out. This time he crashed through the wall and ran away. Over the past century, there have been unconfirmed sightings of his human, and Hulk self.  He is still on the US Paranormal Defense Agencies Top 100 Most Wanted List (Top 10). The agency also actively covers up all public exposure incidents of anyone on a Hulk rampage.  At least a handful of times supposed Earthquake destruction was actually a Hulk going nuts!

The Lonely Life Of Hulks On The Run

Many Hulks end up living a nomadic life moving from town to town taking up odd jobs and helping out the weak in a quest to find a purpose in life. They may look for redemption if they accidentally harmed or killed someone while being a heinous hulk! Some even hope to find a cure but none have found one. They’re also on the run from the government, paranormal investigators, and supernatural hunters who wish to unlock their genetic secrets or simply eradicate them. They fear hurting innocent people and are reluctant to forge close relationships. Only those who truly gain control over their alter ego might dare settle down and raise a family. At least one of their children is likely to possess the Hulk Gene but all will be well so as long as they steer clear of those pesky gamma rays. Those who are evil humans are the most dangerous in Hulk form. They are the ones who appear the most monstrous!

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The Supernatural World Fails To Cure Hulks!

Those Hulks who stumble upon the complete paranormal world have tried working with witches, warlocks, wizards, and sorcerers to cure them of their plight. No magic seems to be a match for the Hulk Gene. Any magical intervention causes the blasphemous beast to appear with a vengeance! Some have attempted to trade their Hulk in for another supernatural being. There are those who tried becoming vampires, werewolves, and a number of other supernatural creatures but such experiments have failed. It seems even the powerful demonic based Vampire, and Lycanthrope virus dies in a Hulks body whether in human or Hulk form. There’s no record of Vampire or Werewolf Hulks. In addition, Hulks are immune to the Zombie Virus.

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Are Hulks The Cure For Vampirism And Lycanthropy?

That being said a non-activated Hulk never exposed to gamma rays can become a vampire, werewolf, and zombie yet upon exposure to radiation their Hulk Gene cures them of those conditions and they become pure Hulk. This is another reason Cryptozoologists want to study the Hulk since it could be a cure for the zombie virus, and other former humans afflicted by metaphysical maladies. Despite this Hulks with psychokinetic powers activated will still possess them in human form while not in Hulk form unless they have maintained some level of their human consciousness.

How To Contain An Incredible Hulk

If you spot a Hulk we recommend staying calm and still to prevent further rampages of death and destruction! Dropping to the fetal position and playing dead is the best defense. Hulks like live subjects to throw and bat around like rag dolls. Do not make eye contact!  Do not run away!  Do not wield a weapon and certainly do not shoot a gun!  You will only anger it further which fuels more strength within. Currently, there is no known method of repellent or extermination for a Hulk. Hulk Hunters use a wide array of weapons and countermeasures that would be lethal to most entities but not the Hulk. If they manage to capture one it is often held in a Graphene and Titanium cage with Hydroxy Gas which is said to aid in neutralizing gamma radiation.

Aaliyah Abebe: Master Hulk Hunter!

Miss Abebe, Hulk Hunter Extraordinaire, goes anywhere a Hulk threatens humankind!

The most famous Hulk Hunter is Aaliyah Abebe from Kenya, Africa. She has the rare power of Radiokinesis, aka the manipulation of radiation. Aaliyah is able to absorb the gamma rays infused within the Hulk and de-transform them back into a human state with a 93% success rate! She must remain within a certain distance to keep the Hulk from coming back. She has experimented with repeatedly using her power on Hulk subjects but has yet to permanently cure one. The most famous experiment had her suppress gamma rays while a Cryptozoologist attempted to isolate and destroy the Hulk Gene. Inexplicably, the subject woke up from anesthesia and hulked out beyond Aaliyah’s control leaving a severe path of destruction in its wake!¬† Thankfully Aaliyah, and her team,The Abebe Alliance, were able to re-contain the Hulk! Naturally, Aaliyah and her hunters are in high demand wherever a hulk manifests. Unfortunately she doesn’t have mad teleportation skills and it takes time to globe trot to any given disaster.¬† If you’ve seen a Hulk or suspect someone is a Hulk please contact your nearest private paranormal professional ASAP!ūü§Ę

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The Patriot Woman Urban Legend

Out of the tragedy of the World Trade Center terrorist attacks on September 11th, 2001 came a glimmer of superhero hope! Of course, we know of the various special people who develop powers from gamma radiation such as the notorious Hulks. The Japanese Fukushima Disaster created an unprecedented amount of Incredible Hulks that required the government to set forth great effort to cover it up and suppress media coverage.¬† Most humans develop cancer from radiation but some with the right paranormal genetics develop psychokinetic powers. To a lesser extent various carcinogens and toxic material that aren’t necessarily radioactive can activate latent powers hidden within our junk DNA.

The One In A Billion Superpower Jackpot!

After the destruction of the World Trade Center, a toxic dust cloud blanketed New York City with perilous particulate. The ruble of the Twin Towers continued to burn perplexing pollutants into the air for months afterward. There were numerous cases of various illnesses and cancer from those near ground zero of the dastardly disaster.  This was especially true when it came to First Responders and heroes who selflessly risked their own lives to save others. In the case of one lucky woman, breathing in the potentially deadly debris netted her some totally titanic powers!

Patriot Woman Is Born From Ashes Of Destructive Despair

We don’t know her real name due to her secretive nature. We only know that she calls herself Patriot Woman in honor of September 11th Patriot Day. Humans with powers and sapient supernatural creatures generally strive to keep a low profile. Naturally, they want to avoid being the subject of capture and experimentation by the government, or private rogue organizations. Those who are aware of the Supernatural Secrecy Pact are also quite vigilant to avoid mass public exposure of their abilities for fear of incurring the higher dimensional consequences of their actions. If they aren’t aware it’s not uncommon for someone in the paranormal community to pay them a visit!

On September 11th, 2001 Patriot Woman was actually a wheelchair bound 82 year old born in 1919.¬† She had bravely served as a nurse in the European battles of World War II against Hitler’s Germany.¬† Unfortunately, some stray bullets of cowardice paralyzed her from the waist down while she attempted to single-handedly save a soldiers life.¬† She was never able to walk again until 2001. Read The Rest Of This Urban Legend On Our Halloween Blog…

Is The Greatest American Hero Based On A True Story?

Can Super Suits Give People Powers?
The early 80’s television series The Greatest American Hero was the story of a school teacher named¬†Ralph Hinkley who received a superhero suit from extraterrestrials. ¬†The suit gave him fantastical powers for the purpose of aiding humankind. Unfortunately it took him time to gain some mastery of the few powers he knew of since he lost the instruction book that came with the suit. The central powers were superhuman strength, speed, and agility along with flight, and even invisibility. Ralph was also able to deflect bullets, shake off being hit by speeding vehicles, and withstand explosives. ¬†Of course the powers were in the suit so he became a normal human once he removed it. ¬†The television show itself was an original creation of the late Stephen J Cannell, and wasn’t the retelling of real history kept hidden from humankind. Amazingly enough a number of fictional works are actually based on real supernatural stories!

How Did The Greatest American Hero Super Suit Work?
All we know from the TV show is that the suit was bonded to Ralph, or a chosen user’s, DNA. ¬†Otherwise it was useless to anyone else who wore it. However one episode shows how the suit can’t be destroyed by any means which¬†might indicate anyone could wear it as armor. Although the force of fist blows, or bullets might still injure an unauthorized wearer. In the same way a bullet proof jacket prevents people from getting shot yet the force of the projectile hitting them hurts like hell! ¬†Anything else about the inner workings of the super suit are conjecture. Clearly though the aliens had great technology so it wasn’t based on magic. More than likely the suit employed other worldly nanotechnology, or the manipulation of matter at a microscopic scale. ¬†Plausibly the suit was constructed of nanofibers¬†along with being managed by nanobots, or intelligent microscopic robots, and computer processors. ¬†These nanobots may have been responsible for the interface between the super clothing, and the human body.

Three Fantastical Tales Of Real Super Powered Suits!
As far as we know there is no indication of aliens giving any humans a super suit in any historical records. ¬†Not even in the secret supernatural record only accessible by those of us in the true paranormal community. ¬†However there are three¬†verifiable incidents of people receiving super powered suits. These incidents were recorded by reputable witnesses in some cases. Many were culled from the minds of powerful psychics, mystics, and seers. In some cases names are withheld to protect the innocent, and their families from paranormal power players, and the government! For the purposes of this article we aren’t going to mention every mythological object, or article of clothing that was imbued with some manner of power. We’re talking about a modern era superhero outfit with a full complement of superhuman abilities.

The World War II Superman And The Genie
A young 18 year old was drafted into World War II within the Pacific battlefront against the Japanese in 1942. His plane was downed in the ocean, and a Japanese boat took him prisoner.  He was placed into a work camp with non-Japanese Asians on an uncharted island at the time.  The downtrodden, and malnourished slaves became invigorated by the brash young soldier. They looked to him as a beacon of hope who would somehow miraculously engineer their escape from the living hell of the work camp!  The soldier made two escape attempts but failed! He ended up being beaten severely the second time.  He was kept alive since the Japanese camp commander enjoyed toying with him, and hoped he could be of some value someday. Perhaps as part of a prisoner exchange with America.

The painfully bedridden soldier¬†paged through his Superman comic, and wished he had the power to help the people held prisoner. Their hope slipped away, and they sobbed in agony as they had before he arrived. ¬†A month later he was healed, and plotted one last escape even though he had been warned he would be killed if he tried again! This time he actually made it to the beach where he had ditched a flare when he first arrived before being searched. ¬†He found it buried in the sand, and would wait until nightfall in the hopes of alerting a US air squadron of the enemy camp’s location. While on the beach he read his Superman comic again, and wished with all his heart he had such powers, and abilities. Suddenly something moved in the sand near him. ¬†He uncovered an exotic looking bottle made of pink, and purple glass bobbing back, and forth seemingly on its own. ¬†He popped the lid free after struggling with it. ¬†Shockingly a huge plume of pink smoke flew forth. ¬†It’s aroma was that of the most alluring perfume ever. ¬†As the smoke cleared a beguiling beauty wearing a violet bikini, and billowing wisps of see through pink clothing stood before him. Before he could say a word the Genie said,”Greetings Master! Your Three Wishes Are My Command!”

Genies are a tricky sort since they’re usually angry for being locked in a bottle, and permanently tied to it for eternity. His wishes were hurriedly made without thinking things through since he was so shocked, and in awe by the entire revelation of a Genie being real! His first wish was clumsy blurted out as,”I wish I was like¬†Superman!”¬†So naturally the naughty Genie simply gave him a useless Superman costume. ¬†She laughed as he became enraged at being tricked. He immediately said¬†“I wish for¬†Superman’s powers dammit”! ¬†He wasn’t specific enough, and she put the powers into the suit. ¬†He got even angrier when he tried to lift a boulder, and hurt his back. ¬†However she responded,”The powers are in the suit dummy!” ¬†He was annoyed at not having the powers within him but eagerly put the suit on to test it. Indeed he had super abilities beyond that of mere mortals! He was happy now but really wanted the powers for himself. He was about to make that his third wish when the Genie stripepd naked, and began seducing him. In a moment of weakness without thinking he wished he could make love to her. So indeed she complied!¬†Not surprisingly he wasn’t furious¬†about being tricked again since the sex was supernatural, and beyond belief! This is a common tactic used among Genies for the purpose of getting you to waste a wish.

After his sandy escapade the Genie blew back in her bottle to await a new Master. ¬†The soldier then flew to the camp as Superman, and lay waste to the facility of damnation. ¬†He eradicated the Japanese troops, and freed everyone.¬†They got to the beach, and the new Superman looked for the Genie bottle so everyone could get wishes. Unfortunately it mysteriously disappeared! ¬†He then flew away to get a boat to take everyone home. ¬†Along the way he encountered a squadron of Japanese attack planes. The super soldier decided to take them head on. ¬†When he’d taken down the work camp he had moved so quickly, and taken them by surprise that the flaw in his suit hadn’t been seen by sheer luck.

The¬†power was ultimately in the suit but it had to transfer to the body to allow for the full range of Kryptonian abilities. However exposed areas that the suit didn’t cover were weaker. That being the hands, neck, and head. The soldier had noticed his hands were sore but choose to assume he overdid things at the massive camp fight. ¬†He planned to punch a plane but his hand ended up being smashed as explosive debris hit his head with concussive force while he flew¬†at them with immense speed! ¬†Although not killed he was knocked out cold as he fell into the deep depths of the sea. ¬†Regrettably he sunk so deep that the pressure crushed his skull, and he expired. Presumably his body decayed, and the Superman suit still exists to this day in a dark watery grave! If you find it we recommend cutting some material from the cape¬†in order to have it sewn into a full head mask, and gloves for your own protection!

The Case Of The Dead Time Traveler’s Super Suit
It was the Summer Of Love 1967 in San Francisco when a groovy hot hippie chick met a most mysterious man who called himself John Smith. However we know him to be a Time Cop from the 31st century named Xander Loovang.  Although he was on a mission to capture a temporal fugitive hiding in 1967 he became enamored by the 27 year old girl.  He indulged in a romance as the trail ran cold on the fugitive. He never told her that he was a time traveler. It turned out the fugitive was watching him, and attacked while he slept in bed one fateful night. John was instantly disintegrated by a photonic disruptor! The filthy fiend heard a small scream coming from the bathroom, and gleefully strolled toward the closed door.

Before the time fugitive arrived the girl had¬†noticed an odd looking shimmering¬†blue jumpsuit complete with boots in John’s suitcase. It was a technology driven super suit utilizing wild nanotechnologies. Probably the closest thing to The Greatest American Hero super suit. ¬†John wore it under the clothes of any given time period for protection, and superhuman powers. It was so oddly futuristic¬†looking that she felt compelled to try it on. It was too big for her until it suddenly shrunk, and fit her perfectly. She let out a yelp as it scared her. A moment later the fugitive kicked in the door and shot her with his photonic ray gun. The suit absorbed it as she screamed, “What the f&#*!” ¬†This absorption into the suit caused some kind of feedback loop that damaged the gun. Although it had one shot left before it would no longer work. He pointed it at her head but the suit had a protection shield, and it bounced off grazing his arm. He dropped the gun growling in agony as he attempted to punch her with his good arm. ¬†He broke his hand on her suit, and she slapped him in the face. It send him crashing head first into the toilet. The porcelain shattered everywhere as water flowed across the floor. The girl became aware that the suit had immense power!

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Suddenly the damaged disrupter exploded, and the entire house was instantly destroyed with only the girl standing unscathed in the fiery rubble! All time travel, and other future devices were eradicated in the violent explosion. At the time it was explained away as a natural gas explosion. Thankfully the girl¬†was met by a psychic who lived nearby. The woman with the gift of second sight guided her down the exciting road to superhero status. This included informing her that John was a time traveler, and the suit was from the future. ¬†The suit granted her superhuman abilities including telekinetic powers, and flight capabilities. It also makes her immortal for as long she has the suit on. ¬†They say she only takes it off for sex since the nanobots give her a constant 24-7 bath making her the cleanest non-magical human on Earth! To this day she¬†operates carefully in the shadows, mostly at night, to stay away from the media’s glare. Her superhero name is¬†Super Sapphire since the suits coloring appears like that of the sapphire gemstone. ¬†Mystic Investigations hopes to someday meet her!

The Witches Revenge Halloween Super Suit
It was Halloween Eve 1988 in a small Wisconsin town unnamed to protect the innocent.  A local thirty something bachelor, and factory worker named Fred bought a Greatest American Hero Costume to wear at a Halloween party.  The costume shop he purchased it from was owned by a middle aged witch named Heather. She was forced to drastically lowers prices, and liquidate stock in her failed business due to the building lease coming to an end. She blamed the town folk for her financial woes. Especially since they shunned her as an outcast for being so different in the deeply Christian community.  She was always too lazy to get a job, and had lucked out when her Aunt died thereby leaving the costume shop to her. Before that she had a nasty habit of using magic to manipulate people but she barely got by financially.

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That Halloween she used every ounce of her limited magic to call upon a demon.  She sold her soul to watch the town turn into a chaotic hell on Halloween.  She was given a power boost that she used to cursed every costume ever sold from that store.  It would turn everyone into the supernatural being, human celebrity, or fictional character their costume represented. This even included memories. Despite the communities citizens not liking her, she was the only costume shop in town. In fact the only one in the whole county! So everyone who wanted a costume got it from her! As trick-o-treating, and the parties commenced at dusk on Halloween, all hell broke loose. The town was full of confusion, and violence for 6 hours until the November 1st All Saints Day Witching Hour! Naturally the worst offenders were the ones who dressed as the Devil! The town was overrun by little vampires, werewolves, zombies, ghosts, witches, and wild animals! Yes people who dressed as animals turned into them!  Many died that night but many were saved by The Greatest American Hero Fred who believed he was Ralph Hinkley. He even tried to contact Bill Maxwell at the FBI but the phone lines, and power were immediately damaged by unholy beasts of the night!

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The dark witch Heather strolled among the carnage unscathed due to a protection spell. She¬†cackled maniacally as she was never so entertained in her life! Heather witnessed Fred fly erratically overhead before comically crashing into a tree.¬†Then suddenly the Witching Hour struck, and everyone who was still alive reverted back to their old selves. They had no memory of what happened, and were shocked at the shambles of a town. Flames raged everywhere amid wounded individuals. The witch was satisfied with her revenge until she saw Fred still displaying powers. He flew about putting out fires, and¬†continuing to save people as he had done all night. ¬†She was flabbergasted he still had powers but didn’t have time to contemplate it as unholy howls¬†bellowed from below the ground that opened up in flames beneath her! Red hands with black claws literally dragged her down to Hell! ¬†She screeched in pain as The Greatest American Hero attempted to save her. Thankfully he was repelled by a demonic force before the ground closed up. He had no clue she was the quintessence of evil!

It seems the spell for the curse stated that the person would turn into the entity the costume represented. This didn’t account for a super suit imbued with power. ¬†Fred got his memories back, and also remembered being Ralph. However there was nothing in the spell to remove the so called curse from the super suit costume. ¬†Therefore it’s superpowers were perpetual. ¬†Before dawn the US government’s¬†Paranormal Defense Agency swooped in to do their usual cover up. This is why you never heard of this mini apocalypse in rural Wisconsin. ¬†Paranormal Defense Agents attempted to capture Fred but he fought them off, and flew away. He immediately went to his various relatives living in the Milwaukee area, and whisked them away into hiding so the government couldn’t use them as leverage. To finance this private witness protection program he helped himself to a plethora of gold, and diamond mines rather than steal cash. ¬†Unfortunately the government eventually found him, and apprehended Fred while he showered without the suit on. When agents searched his house they were unable to locate the suit. He swore he left it under his bed but it vanished without a trace until 1999. That year a Greatest American Hero costume was bought on Ebay for $75. The purchaser reported the suit gave him powers so we know it’s transferable unlike the suit on the TV show that only Ralph could use.

Naturally the government apprehended him as well even though the unidentified man never took the suit off ever! They employed two powerful vampires, and a low level witch who captured him in exchange for their release from government custody. In an odd twist aliens swooped in, and beamed the suit up to their saucer once it was pulled¬†off the man in the transport convoy back to Washington DC. So we have a plausible future scenario where extraterrestrials could indeed give the suit to a human! Believe it or not…..they’re walking¬†on air!

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