Wednesday Wisdom

Wednesday Way Winds Wildly Through Wayward Worry Woods Onto Thursdays Thankful Thoroughfare Fleeing To The Friday Freeway Of Freedom That Then Snakes Into Saturday Street’s Serenity Which Slides Soundly Into The Sunday Subway Slinking Seriously Into Monday’s Madness Moving To Tuesday’s Turnpike Of Terror Thereby Riding You Right The Hell Back To Wednesday Way!😬 You’re Stuck On A Never Ending Series Of Roads That Go Nowhere! Enjoy Your Work Week…and of course the longest sentence ever in all capital letters I DON’T KNOW WHY!😮 #WednesdayWisdom #WednesdayMotivation #WednesdayThoughts #WednesdayMorning 🧐

By Xavier Remington | Mystic Poetry Portal |

See Also: The Monday Morning Blues

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The Legend Of La Llorona Halloween Horror Nights

The video above is a walk-through tour of La Llorona Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida. Certainly a memorable staged horror experience sure to scare the hell out of you but the media did not tell the whole paranormal story of this Halloween attraction. This, of course, was due to the standard government cover-up! It seems the damned spirit La Llorona did not take kindly to her name, and tragic story being used as an amusement for silly humans. In response, she made a number of nightmarish appearances at the haunted house causing the horror to become very real!

Her story begins hundreds of years ago in Mexico, New Spain at the time, when she was a woman named Maria who fell madly in love with an evil man. A selfish man who demanded she get rid of her kids permanently if she wanted to be with him. Some say he was a practitioner of magic who bewitched Maria into a blind love that caused her to drown her children in the river that very night. That man was none other than the diabolical Sorcerer Dimitri Diablo who was just beginning his terrifying trek into the world of dark magic. In recent years he has become the current King Of Hell! Tricking the woman into killing her kids was clearly a sacrifice to Demons in order to grant him paranormal power. Such dastardly child sacrifices to demons only work if done by the parents since they have domain over the child’s soul until mature.

After Maria did the damning deed she was promptly rejected by Dimitri which caused her to commit suicide providing the final seal of the sinister sacrifice. In the afterlife, she was denied entry into Heaven until she produced the souls of her children who wandered the Earth in a confused ghostly state. This due to the trauma of being murdered by their own mother in a dark cold river. In addition, she was denied entry into Hell as the Devil saw the future, and knew Diablo would be a threat to him.  Therefore he didn’t want him accumulating power from his demons. So the sacrifice, in fact, failed as the entire family was left in Earthly dark spiritual limbo. Interestingly enough, centuries later the Devil and Diablo came to a truce after years of civil war in Hell. Diablo would remain King so as long as he pledged loyalty to Satan as the ultimate Emperor of evil.

Maria was left to wander the Earth as a poltergeist in search of her kids for all eternity! Along the way she torments those she comes into contact with. The darkness and rage grow in her empty soul with each passing century as her ghostly children hide from her out of fear. Every so often her power peaks to the point of solidifying her metaphysical energy form, and temporarily becoming a deeply dangerous corporeal being.  Devoid of Heavenly hope she abducts random children who make the mistake of venturing out at night near bodies of water. Rivers in particular where she expects to find the ghosts of her kids floating about. Any adults who stand in her way receive the terror of her violent wrath!

She is called La Llorona, aka The Weeping Woman, due to her constant weeping over the guilt of killing her kids. A guilt that is actually worse than the real Hell. When near her children’s souls they can be heard crying as well in
unison with her. Her spine-tingling wales bellow throughout the night. Particularity through the Witching and Devil’s Hours. Legend has it that anyone who hears it is marked to receive her terrifying torment. If a child hears it then odds are good they will be abducted by her! Often they are never seen again! Where these kids end up nobody knows. Some say she kills them, steals their souls, and then attempts to deliver them to Heaven in place of her own kids. Naturally, the kids would be taken from her by Angels, and she would be banished back to Earth. Let’s hope that is the happy ending for these poor children.

Certainly, there is precedent in the supernatural world for kidnapped kids to be held in various forms of supernatural stasis with the hope of eventual release, and a return to their normal lives again. Slenderman is the best example with his kidnapped kids being located in caves decades later. None of them aged a day! There is some evidence to indicate that La Llorona grows weary of imprisonment on Earth. This may lead her to sacrificing innocent children to demons in the hopes of delivering souls to them so she can gain entry into Hell. The Weeping Woman sees this as better than her ghostly existence in this plane of reality she can never truly be apart of. If she pleases the Devil she could see a future promotion to demonhood status. Of course, the guy who set this off is King Of Hell so this may ruin things for her. Perhaps Dimitri Diablo would love to see her gravel at the foot of his fiery throne and let her be his Queen Of Hell?

Now that we have the backstory of his horrifying individual we must report the past incidents at the Universal Studios haunted house in her name. Witnesses have reported a female specter screaming in agony one minute then cackling maniacally the next. She has attempted to drag children away and caused injury to adults since she has amassed power allowing her to take temporary physical form. Luckily the good folks at Universal immediately called in various paranormal experts. This included experienced Exorcists from the Catholic Church who cleansed the Halloween horror attraction of the La Llorona menace. Naturally, they also saw the public relations nightmare, and promptly covered up the unfortunate incidents.  Even if they hadn’t the government, aka the US Paranormal Defense Agency, would have most likely done it for them. We are confident that everything is safe and under a protection spell from all manner of supernatural beings in the popular theme park. A top flight witches coven from Ireland reported they received a hefty five figure sum to cast their protective cloak on the amusement park!

Next Urban Legend: The Lancaster Haunted House Pentalpha Poltergeist

Posted in Dimitri Diablo, Halloween Amusement Parks, Halloween Haunted House, Halloween Legends, Halloween Stories, Urban Legends | Leave a comment

The Microwave Monster

The Microwave Monster is the sinister story of a dormant shape-shifting extraterrestrial who arrived on Earth in the early 2000’s.  It traveled from the Andromeda Galaxy as a shapeless black blob in stasis within a small capsule-like ship that took over 20,000 years to get here through various sub-space wormhole passages. It plummeted to Earth on Halloween 2005 and was attracted to the electromagnetic radiation of a nearby cellphone. It immediately took the form of the device but found itself locked into it permanently. This was due to Earth’s atmosphere being beyond foreign to its biochemistry.

On Halloween night some foolish guy, dressed as Neo from the Matrix, found the phone on a sidewalk and thought he lucked out. However, when they got home to more closely examine it they found out it didn’t work. The person was so mad that they threw it in the microwave, and turned it on hoping to see it explode. Interestingly enough the radioactive environment of the microwave was close to the aliens home environment, and it reverted to its natural monstrous form! It promptly blew the door off the microwave, and devoured the unlucky human with sinister glee! The angered alien then proceeded to go on a rampage killing everyone in the entire house. The blasphemous beast was intelligent enough to realize it only had to give itself a microwave power boost to stay in its alien state and continue to lay waste to all in the vicinity.

Government agents from the US Paranormal Defense Agency quickly swooped in, and nearly captured the crazed creature. It narrowly escaped into the woods and took the shape of an Elm tree. Despite an extensive search by the government and private paranormal organizations, the tree was never found! Its ability to completely duplicate an object down to the DNA level was very precise. Thankfully it is most likely locked into that shape with a lack of microwave radiation. Also, it is fortunate it can’t move when taking another form. In other words, it can’t be a human walking amongst us!

Next Urban Legend: St. Louis Haunted House Incident | The Urban Legend’s Homepage

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Happy August!

🌞August!🍃 The last bastion of summer sun and vacation fun before you surrender to the stress of September’s school!📚 Still there is hope as Halloween hovers ever closer!🎃

By Xavier Remington | Mystic Poetry Portal |

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