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Christian Bale Thanks The Devil Who Made Him Famous!

 At the 2019 Golden Globe Awards, Christian Bale won Best Actor for his portrayal of former US Vice-President Dick Cheney in the movie Vice. During his acceptance speech, he thanked the prolific Prince Of Darkness Satan for giving him Continue reading Christian Bale Thanks The Devil Who Made Him Famous!

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The Plague Doctor Saves Earth From Aliens!

The Plague Doctor, aka Dr. Darius “Death” Maximilian, is a notorious supernatural criminal who works to spread disease around the world. His dream is to see the planet pounded into a paranormal pandemic! His endgame is to shape this reality Continue reading The Plague Doctor Saves Earth From Aliens!

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Leprechauns Decree New Saint Patrick’s Day Traditions

King Lochlann, Leader of the proud Irish Leprechaun people, has decreed new holiday protocols for March 17th Saint Patrick’s Day with the consent of the Leprechauns patron Saint the infamous Angel Patrick.  These new traditions are meant to bolster the Continue reading Leprechauns Decree New Saint Patrick’s Day Traditions

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The Mardi Gras Joker Was Twarted By Patriot Woman!

The self-proclaimed Voodoo powered leader of Mardi Gras known as The Mardi Gras Joker was up to his old nefarious tricks on February 13th, 2018! There are many tales of the despicable acts perpetrated by him and his thugs throughout Continue reading The Mardi Gras Joker Was Twarted By Patriot Woman!

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Supernatural Connection To Denver Broncos Super Bowl XLVIII Loss

The Denver Broncos lost Super Bowl XLVIII in one of the most embarrassing defeats in football history on February 2nd, 2014! This one-sided match was almost surreal as the Seattle Seahawks pummeled the Broncos who had a score of zero for Continue reading Supernatural Connection To Denver Broncos Super Bowl XLVIII Loss

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The North American Sasquatch Uprising!

Since 2017 Mystic Investigations has been tracking an ever-growing Sasquatch rebellion. The Bigfoot, sometimes called the missing link, are a distant relative of humankind genetically altered by extraterrestrial’s experimenting with the supernatural in North America. They were the first intelligent Continue reading The North American Sasquatch Uprising!

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The Roswell Extraterrestrial Conspiracy And The Autopsy Of An Alien

A documentary chronicling the infamous Roswell, New Mexico incident and the conspiracy to cover it up. Also amazing video of a possible alien autopsy!

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Hawaii’s Kīlauea Volcano Eruption Caused By A Nature Deity Dispute

The alarming eruption of the volcano Kilauea in Hawaii on May 3, 2018 along with subsequent earthquakes has a supernatural cause! Various Hawaiian Priestesses, Mystics, Psychics, and Seers have agreed that a war of the Gods began brewing on April Continue reading Hawaii’s Kīlauea Volcano Eruption Caused By A Nature Deity Dispute

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Jason Voorhees Resurrected On Friday The 13th!

The Dark Story Of The Jason Voorhees Cult He’s Back! We finally received confirmation that our Jason Voorhees Resurrection Warnings unfortunately came true on Friday November 13th, 2015. The venomous Voorhees Cult has been marshaling metaphysical energies over the course of two years from Friday Continue reading Jason Voorhees Resurrected On Friday The 13th!

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Christian Bale Thanks The Devil Who Made Him Famous!


At the 2019 Golden Globe Awards, Christian Bale won Best Actor for his portrayal of former US Vice-President Dick Cheney in the movie Vice. During his acceptance speech, he thanked the prolific Prince Of Darkness Satan for giving him the inspiration to play the role of Cheney. Of course many in the live audience and watching at home laughed at what appeared to be a joke and commentary on Cheney’s method of ruthless rule. When Bale said this he knew it would be taken that way or he would have never spoken the words. However, it turns out Bale actually knows the Devil himself! In fact, many in the supernatural and celebrity community know that Christian made a demonic deal to gain the fame he enjoys today!😈

Bale’s Battle To Star In American Psycho Motivates A Deal With The Devil!

It is known that many celebrities have risen to fame courtesy of diabolical deals with the Devil or his demonic minions. Our connections in the paranormal world indicate that Christian Bale actually met Satan 1997. Some months before that Bale began the fight to star as the psychotic serial killer Patrick Bateman in the classic horror comedy film American Psycho. Christian had a gut instinct that the movie would finally propel him to A-List stardom but the good folks down at Lionsgate Films thought he wasn’t famous enough. They were actively courting Leonardo DiCaprio along with offering the unique role to Edward Norton and Ewan Mcgregor. Bale remained committed to starring in American Psycho despite Lionsgate not wanting him. He truly believed one way or another he’d realize his dream. In the process, he turned down other acting jobs to stay available for the project! Watch American Psycho Online To See Where Christians Dark Journey Began!

Christian Sells His Soul To Satan!

Finally one night Christian had the most vivid lucid dream of his life in which Satan presented himself in his former glorious visage of the light known as the Archangel Lucifer. Naturally, he almost always introduces himself this way to those who will potentially sell their souls. Wouldn’t you accept an angel over a demon any day of the week? After Satan convinced Bale he was a cool, calm, and collected he met with him later that day in a tranquil park. The Devil manifested in astral form but appeared to be solidly there. It was there he told Christian everything he needed to know before entering into a Hell Contract with Satan. This included revealing he was no longer an Archangel but rather the ArchDemon Emperor Of Hell. Satan is the most charismatic and carefully calculating individual ever known in the world of darkness. It’s said he’s the ultimate salesman! He easily lulled Christian into a state of submission and after some consideration, Bale confidently signed his soul over to the Devil!😈

Hell’s Adopted Son Sees Success

Bale entered this Soul contract freely and is privy to every last detail since Universal Law and The Supernatural Secrecy Pact requires the Devil, and all who wish to purchase souls, to tell the truth to those seeking to sell. Basically, the Devil promised to secure Bale the starring role in American Psycho along with continued support in his rise to fame and riches. Indeed Satan’s agents at Lionsgate granted Bale the role he fought for and the rest is history! He’s currently worth $80 million dollars while being regularly sought out for excellent roles in top-flight films!

The Conditions Of The Bale Hell Contract

In order to guarantee a pleasant paradise in Hell, he must do favors for the Devil and his minions when asked. This includes a certain quota of soul-selling referrals each year along with being a card-carrying member of the infamous Devil worshiping Illuminati! Failure to comply with the conditions of the Hell Contract result in an early demise by the horrifying hands of dark Illuminati associates. Then comes the torture in Hell for a time. After that punishment they must torture others. If the Devil is pleased then they can become a Demons Apprentice and possibly a full Demon someday. Once demonic status is obtained his place in Hell will be securely sealed without worry of any pesky unpleasantness normally associated with the fire and brimstone!

What Will Life In Hell Be Like For Christian Bale?

From what we know Christian Bale is holding up his end of the bargain. Unfortunately, we see the pressure break free with a bit of violent angry behavior every so often! If Bale continues to honor the contract he will live a long healthy prosperous life. Upon a natural death, there are indications he has an optional rider in his contract to be reincarnated in the future to live out another life. This includes more support from the Devil. Clearly, Bale made a smart deal selling his soul for two lives! Once he finally dies Bale’s soul will be rejected by the light of Heaven as per Universal Law. Instead, he will go to Hell and act as a respected entertainer in the Devil’s Royal Hell Court along with other soul selling celebs. He will be allowed to design his own paradise realm to reside in during his free time. However, when in Hell the work ethic is deeply emphasized!

Bale Will Attain Blasphemous Demonhood Status!

Christian will be expected to train under a Demon as an apprentice and will eventually descend into Demonhood. Throughout this process, his human soul is slowly separated from the growing dark demonic spirit. The soul’s metaphysical energy must be preserved for the general paranormal power of Hell. Human souls provide major power boosts to whoever possesses them! Bales demon form will derive its power from his Demon Master and Satan as well. Christian will also be expected to train new demons, carrying out non-entertainment tasks in Hell, and even venture into the real world to recruit new souls. There are also undercover missions in Hollywood, governments, corporations, and other Earthly power centers. When doing this he will most likely possess a human. The manifestation of biological demons on Earth is actively thwarted by Angels! Bale may make his former celebrity form known to people who potentially want to sell their souls. Every little advantage helps! If he’s in hell long enough and collects a metric ton of souls then Bale could ascend to ArchDemon status. Although not anywhere on the same level as the fallen Archangel origin ones like Lucifer.

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Christian Bale’s Ultimate Redemption

When the War Of Armageddon is inevitably won by Heaven or the Earthly Gods then Hell will be permanently shut down! All Angelic origin demons will either be eradicated or locked away. The Devil himself is thought to be one who will find themselves locked in Heaven’s Prison for all eternity! Human origin demons like Christian Bale will be sent to Purgatory to be cleansed of their sinful darkness. As the dark demon spirit is chipped away in the ice-cold void amid Ice Demons the human soul is reintegrated in the consciousness mix. Bale will then ascend to the Heavenly afterlife to continue his path to higher dimensional redemption. He will have a chance to ascend to Angelhood and even Godhood status someday. His experiences down the path of darkness will grant him insightful wisdom he would have not otherwise had. Pray for Christian as he continues down this precarious path for the material sake of wealth and stardom!😇

Watch The Movie Vice On Amazon!

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The Plague Doctor Saves Earth From Aliens!

The Plague Doctor, aka Dr. Darius “Death” Maximilian, is a notorious supernatural criminal who works to spread disease around the world. His dream is to see the planet pounded into a paranormal pandemic! His endgame is to shape this reality in his sick image that includes him being the God of a new monstrous race of microbes, viruses, and bacteria in a sapient humanoid form! We now know that sometime in mid-July 2019 he sort of got his wish. However, wishes that seem too good to be true can often turn out to be unexpected nightmares.

Earth Gets Its First Visit From Intelligent Virus Based Extraterrestrials

While sacrificing disease-ridden humans to his God Pestilence, one of the Four Horsemen Of The Apocalypse, the Plague Doctor accidentally aided in the opening of a portal to a perplexing planet in the Triangulum Galaxy. Aliens from that world were experimenting with the folding of space-time in conjunction with a location mechanism that sought out conscious life in the Universe. It’s plausible they would have eventually found Earth but in this case, they sensed the dark supernatural presence of a sick puppy who literally loves deadly microbes. Not surprising for a guy who can never be affected by any disease and is instead the ultimate asymptomatic carrier. The dastardly Doctor’s microbial love was important because the extraterrestrials in question were a species of humanoid viruses from a planet ripe with animals directly evolved from viruses, bacteria, and other macabre microbes.

The Plague Doctor Attempts To Make Peace With His Dream Aliens

The viral aliens had never seen anything like humans before. Despite their grotesque appearance the Plague Doctor removed his iconic bird’s beak mask and greeted them with a warm smile. His right-hand woman Typhoid Mary smiled nervously and put forth a brave greeting. Mary might not be as far into the Plague Doctor’s vision as she once thought? The Doctors normally malevolent minions tried not to let their trepidation show as they stood among the human sacrifices. The Plague Doctor sensed fear among his people and tried to assure them they were all among friends. As he was a master of Disease Manipulation, aka Virokinesis, he was able to communicate and calm the virus aliens natural aggression. Their instinct was to devour or assimilate all life into its viral form. The Doctor offered them his sacrifices for dinner. It was a most horrifying vision as the alien slurped up the dead humans. Some of the Doctors minions were said to have puked thus embarrassing him. He then offered them up for assimilation.

Doctor Death And His Dark Denizens Ironically Attempt To Save Earth

The Plague Doctor quickly realized his paranormal powers of disease weren’t enough to control their intelligent minds. They began quickly multiplying as he sensed their intent to take over the planet. Something that could have easily happened within days due to their rapid exponential growth and assimilation of all life! His Lord Pestilence telepathically commanded him to stop these abominations and their interference of Armageddon prophesy. Doctor Death hesitated a bit as this was his dream. Once they made a move on his dark love Typhoid Mary he sprang into action! He might not have much control of their minds but his virus manipulation could wreak some havoc on their disgusting bodies!

The Asymptomatically Diseased Body Of The Plague Doctor Eradicates The Virus ET’s

The Plague Doctor used his unique psychokinetic abilities amid supernatural strength, speed, and agility to battle these bastards! As his eyes glowed with a toxic brown color, he yelled to Mary and his minions to enter the portal to find the device that created it. They would need to destroy it and get back through it somehow. They all donned their biowarfare masks and entered an alien world over 2 million light-years away in an instant! The Doctor went against every fiber of his being and systematically killed the alarming aliens. As he committed what he believed were heinous acts he felt sorrow for the loss of the beautiful blasphemous behemoths. The final horde of the virus ET’s pounced on the Plague master all at once and began to assimilate him. Upon doing so they ingested virtually every disease that has existed on this Earth since the immortal Doctors birth in 1313. The viral extraterrestrials were ironically overwhelmed by Earth’s finest viruses and other diseases. They promptly perished!

The Paranormal Portal To A Hell World Is Closed By The Plague Doctor Cult

Doctor Death raced to the portal and stepped foot on to the most hellish looking planet ever. To him, it was a vision of perfection that made a tear stream from his eye. All animal life was monstrous macro microbes and the plants were mostly fungi and algae based. A rotten stink hung in the putrid air as their sun shined down through green skies. Typhoid Mary ran toward the Doctor screaming, “Help! They’re after us!” The chaotic couple embraced as she declared explosives were about to destroy the portal creation device. His minions were bellowing for help as an epidemic of virus aliens was chasing them. The Doctor and Mary came back to Earth along with a few minions before the portal collapsed trapping the rest in a living nightmare! All data about Earth’s location was eradicated with the destruction of the space-time warping device. Amazingly the Plague Doctor is a hero and Earth’s savior in this one isolated instance. Oh, the humanity!

We Salute A Former Plague Doctor Cult Member For Finding Salvation!

This story came to us courtesy of a former Plague Doctor Cult member who was shaken from her misguided path by this horrifying incident. She informed Mystic Investigations that the Plague Doctor saved the alien corpses and is using them in his experiments to create the perfect pandemic disease! He’s also studying them to make his dream of humanoid viruses become a reality on Earth. Monsters he has 100% control over! Pray this never comes to pass!

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Read About Mystic Investigations Battle With The Plague Doctor On Valentines Day 2018 In New York City!

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Leprechauns Decree New Saint Patrick’s Day Traditions

Leprechaun King

King Lochlann, Leader of the proud Irish Leprechaun people, has decreed new holiday protocols for March 17th Saint Patrick’s Day with the consent of the Leprechauns patron Saint the infamous Angel Patrick.  These new traditions are meant to bolster the holiday forth into the same league as Halloween, Christmas, and Easter.  Humans lend the unique power of their special collective consciousness to holidays which is a form of magic all it’s own. This is why Christmas, and Halloween are the most supernaturally powerful holidays of the year.  King Lochlann is hoping to not only inspire more people in general but also capture the hearts of children who wield the power of magical innocence so crucial to the aforementioned holidays.  Apparently a lot of drunk adults wearing green, and guzzling emerald beer isn’t doing much to aid the Leprechauns in their annual concentrated push to spread good luck around the world in the name of helping the forces of light, and right.  Of course Leprechauns are known to partake of a wee bit of booze now, and then.

The Leprechaun King has set forth new guidelines for Saint Patrick’s celebrations due to the recent first battles of Armageddon, and the general spread of evil on Earth.  In addition the Devil’s presence on Earth has strengthened the resolve of the various forces of darkness including the chief nemesis of the Leprechauns known as the Clurichauns.  Clurichauns, aka dark anti-Leprechauns, are notorious for spreading their own diabolical brand of bad luck along with stealing Leprechauns gold for the purpose of warping it into coins of dark luck.  Now more than ever the Leprechauns need human support in their quest to spread righteous luck, and continue to drive forth the general forces of good perpetuated from Christmas, and Valentines Day.  The essential need to pass the baton of light to Easter!

King Lochlann’s decree includes the following translated from his ancient Gaelic language:

  1. By all means continue drinking copious amounts of green colored alcoholic beverages along with the general wearing of green in support of Irish good luck.  Green is the luckiest color symbolizing the Emerald Isle, and all it’s mystical magic.  Be sure children get a selection of green non-alcoholic drinks as well.  Let the Shamrock Shakes of minty goodness fly forth freely as well!  It’s only once a year so live a little!
  2. Continue having Saint Patrick’s Day parties while transforming them into costume parties that accentuate anything related to Ireland, good luck, or Leprechauns.  Please try to have celebrations more centered around the kids.  Dressing them up as little Leprechauns complete with a wood shillelagh.  They should symbolically spread luck by throwing forth Shamrocks, lucky charms, or candy.  Candy wrapped in gold foil to appear as gold coins placed in a traditional pot that looks like a small cauldron.  Shamrock shaped mints are great as well.  Creation of a Saint Patrick’s treasure hunt to find said pot of gold candy will further fuel the imagination of children to strengthen the Saint Patrick’s holiday.
  3. We encourage people to decorate their homes in green lights, and appropriate Saint Patrick’s decor.  Hang lucky charms about, and have clover plants to exude good luck about.
  4. Our hope is to see children adorned in Leprechaun garb going door to door with their little pots collecting candy, and lucky charms given by generous adults with the Spirit Of Saint Patrick within them.  Pray to Saint Patrick, and let his lucky spirit dwell within you on March 17th.
  5. Near a window we would hope to see a box of live growing shamrocks ready to receive a gift of good luck from from parents to children.  One, or two of which should say it’s from a Leprechaun, or Saint Patrick, in the same way you do with Santa Claus.  Of course all supernatural beings are bound by the Supernatural Secrecy Pact that prevents large scale exposure of the paranormal community.  This is why Santa, and the Leprechauns can only directly deliver things to those within the paranormal community with the exception of a few special cases.  It’s becoming more common in these dire times for Leprechauns to leave lucky gifts with especially deserving members of the supernatural community as a reward for fighting the forces of darkness. Although a Leprechaun isn’t usually seen, his visitation is realized by the bright emerald green carpet of four leaf clovers left behind!
  6. We encourage people to create good luck directly by spotting situations where you can lend a hand to someone in need even on the simplest level.  You can even create a situation.  Something like throwing a quarter in someone’s path while you remain hidden to observe their lucky find.  The coin itself then becomes lucky. Let the Spirit Of Saint Patrick flow through you!
  7. General interest, creativity, and day dreaming involving Saint Patrick’s Day on any level will aid in the elevation of our day to most favored supernatural holiday status.  The Leprechauns, and I thank you for your cooperation in making the Earth the luckiest place in the Universe!

Now please do your part to spread good luck by following the King’s guidelines so you can aid in the forces of good triumphing over that of evil in these extremely trying times!

The King also released a special decree discouraging the capture of his Leprechauns and/or their pots of lucky million dollar gold for the purposes of receiving three coveted good luck based wishes. He said it distracts from the Leprechauns mission but he stated no ill will would come upon anyone partaking of this centuries old venture due to protections from Saint Patrick.  More or less anyone smart, or powerful enough to find the gold or capture the Leprechaun deserves the wishes.  However for everything to go well one must be respectful to the Leprechaun, and always return his gold once the wishes are granted.  Failure to do so can wield the wrath of an angry Leprechaun upon you along with the natural bad luck that will follow.  Anyone can bend good luck into bad luck when they have negative intentions in their heart!

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