The Vampire Cortez is listed in the global vampire archives as a despicable 971-year-old 4th generation vampire who preys on humans for blood, and relishes in a prolonged agonizing kill! All generations of vampire 13, and higher are considered royalty to some extent so we had to tread lightly with this blasphemous bastard for fear of incurring the wrath of Transylvanian First Generation Royals! Especially since this pernicious puke appears to have participated in at least a handful of human hunts with Dracula back in the 1800’s. We’re not sure if they’ve kept in touch but if Dracula didn’t kill him then he must consider him at least worth a crap! Cortez holds the official vampire royal title of Marquess Of Central Colorado which gave him further prestige, and protection courtesy of higher-level vampires! So we had our work cut out for us if we were to save the newly discovered Immortal Fred Jacobson from his clutches!
The only thing on our side was the fact that Cortez had a reputation for reckless rampages that threatened to expose vampires to the world. He received a few slaps on the wrist from Transylvania and wised up. He now satisfies his insatiable blood lust and nefarious need to murder humans via elaborate gaslighting schemes. Especially when dealing with beings possessing special blood such as Immortals. Basically he, and his thugs drive their victims crazy, and then pose as mental health officials who implore families to commit the victim for their own good. This was the case with Fred who eventually began to act sane once we hid him at one of our safe houses. Unfortunately, when dealing with vampires, and their insane sense of smell, instinct, and psychic abilities, it’s rather hard to hide from them! We had to keep moving Fred around until we resolved this matter one way or another!
Our Scottish vampire associate Drake Alexander is known as somewhat of an outsider who has no interest in being a part of the vampire royal hierarchy. Since he is a 5th generation vampire they leave him alone for the most part. Especially since his vampire mother, Duanna Sargon, is an extremely beguiling ancient 4th generation vampire princess who is beloved by many royals including King Dagan. Although his wife Queen Gula is very jealous of her. It’s rumored Dagan, and Duanna once had an affair back in 344 BC Ancient Greece. Supposedly they did it at Aristotle’s house. Amazingly we do know for sure that Dagan made Aristotle a vampire, and he’s still alive somewhere in Greece! As for the rest unfortunately it’s not one of those things you can just casually ask a person! Believe me, I’m dying to know! So Duanna will visit Cortez, and do all the talking with Drake in tow just in case there’s any trouble. The rest of us would not be welcome there…well we would as dinner!
The Demi-Zombie Ashley Abercrombie was doing better but still feels deep remorse over killing those four thugs in white. We still can’t believe she went full zombie on them! You should never go, full zombie! The Good Witch Rebecca Abernathy returned from Ashley’s house now that her boyfriend, the Werewolf Seth Morgan, was back in town. She wanted to just go ahead with a frontal assault on the Vampire Cortez’s Colorado Springs compound wiping out his entire organization leaving no clue of our involvement behind. I’m not sure if we have the power to do that but Rebecca is usually the impulsive one who wants to mow through the forces of darkness with her powerful witchcraft. The total opposite of the normally calm, reserved, and rational Ashley Abercrombie. Rebecca was disappointed in seeing no action but I told her to be ready just in case! Certainly, the Vampire Cortez and all his cohorts deserved to die since Vampire Slayers consider him a top prize in Colorado. It’s estimated he’s the most prolific killer of humans in our State, and possibly the entire Western United States!
Duanna flew in on her private jet from her palace in Turkey and went with Drake to the Cortez Compound not long after sunset. Not only were there human minions but also vampire thugs as well. They all looked upon Duanna with lust but Drake with disgust. Drake was disgusted as well to see various human males and females lying about who looked emaciated as they were drained of blood under the hypnotic spell of the living dead. Cortez happily greeted his guests in his den of iniquity and hid his disdain for Drake. The plan was to charm him before breaching the subject of Fred. An egotistical vampire with his level of pride was sure to say no without some buttering up. He got very intimate with Duanna as they snuggled, and giggled near the hearth while Drake sat in a chair nearby nursing his 100-year-old Scotch. Finally, Duanna asked if he could release Fred Jacobson to them in exchange for a future favor. A favor from a powerful Vampiress like Duanna was worth a lot in the vampire community!
Despite this, he still refused until Drake said, “We’ll give you the Immortal Keanu Reeves!” That got his attention as he had a look of pleasant surprise on his face. Even dare I say a slight sign of a joyful tear appeared! He replied, “Oh sweet son of Satan are you serious? You can get me the Immortal Reeves?” Drake responded, “Yes he thinks we’re good friends so I can lure him here.” Cortez then inquired, “Why would you give up the most prized human blood asset on Earth for a pathetic sub-standard immortal slob like Fred?” Drake then lied, and said, “Keanu has insulted me on several occasions, and his ego needs to be taken down a few pegs! It’s the perfect opportunity to teach him a lesson, and solve our little problem. You don’t mind if I visit every so often to gloat, and taunt him?” Cortez finally agreed, “Oh of course I wouldn’t mind welcoming the man who made me the envy of the vampire world! Reeves I would not extinguish! He would be a fine wine to savor for all eternity! Yes, if you can get me Keanu then Fred is yours! Not much of a deal on your end but whatever floats your boat pal!”
He cackled like a loon for a bit as Duanna, and Drake prepared to leave. Suddenly he said, “Ah Duanna I think we have some unfinished business, my dear! I do believe a sign of good faith would help me believe you’re really going to hand Keanu over to me! This just all seems too good to be true! After centuries of eluding us the holy grail of blood is just tossed on my doorstep like an edition of The Gazette!” Duanna sighed a bit and strolled toward Cortez smiling seductively before passionately kissing him. They then both headed upstairs to his bedroom suite. Drake was about to protest but Duanna raised a hand silently ordering him to back down. He sat back down, and his super hearing eventually heard amorous sounds coming from upstairs. He was quite agitated by the unsavory situation but kept his cool while he sat alone in the dimly lit den.
Twenty minutes passed, and he eventually blocked out the salacious sounds. Especially since another noise hit his ears. A noise of silent desperation. A girl who couldn’t have been more than 13 was crying in the basement, “I want to go home! Mommy help me!” Suddenly the deep voice of a man screamed, “Shut up you little brat! Master will have you later tonight!” He laughed maniacally as the sound of a metal door slamming shut could be heard. Drake knew they were here on a specific mission, and it wasn’t to save all the lost human souls in this hell hole. It went against everything he stood for to do nothing to help the helpless! After hearing the girl cry for five more minutes, along with empathically feeling the living hell all manner of people were going through, he had enough!
Drake strolled out of the den and was immediately halted with two hands on his chest. One from each of two guards standing outside the door. Both were vampires. Drake smiled, and said, “I’m dying for some blood! Could I please visit your blood cellar?” One of them angrily replied, “Nobody gets blood in this house unless Master commands it! Get back in the den traitor!” Drake then replied, “I’m not a traitor! I just want to be free, and live my own way.” The other one responded,” Yeah we know you kill our kind, you bastard! If Master ordered us we’d stake your sorry ass right now!” Drake’s grin left his face as his eyes glowed seriously crimson, and he appeared a bit monstrous with fangs extended. Drake then exclaimed, “Thankfully I’m not a pathetic lackey who kisses a Masters ass. I don’t need anyone’s permission to do this!” Drake pulled out a wooden stake and vanquished the two vampires before they could say a word. They burst into unholy violet flames and were ash within seconds.
Another vampire had been walking nearby, and came running since the sound of extinguished vampire makes a very distinct noise. Drake quickly snapped his neck, and then proceeded to decapitate him with his bare hands causing another cloud of ash to fly about the now smokey room! Luckily there were no surveillance cams as they couldn’t risk someone tapping into the feed, and having video proof of vampires for the mainstream media to see! Drake looked around nervously as he called Rebecca Abernathy on his cell phone. He whispered, “It’s a go! I’m taking down this sick bastard!” Rebecca excitedly replied, “Yes!” She was right outside the compound as she bellowed, “Mystic Sphere!“, and flew on to the property in her protective witchcraft-based pink metaphysical energy bubble. As she came whizzing onto the compound grounds some guards looked up and fired machine guns at her but the bullets bounced off. Flying in behind her was the rest of our team in the Mysticopter flown by none other than myself with Ex-Navy Seal Hunter Jackson in the co-pilot seat. It’s a highly advanced military attack helicopter with all manner of weaponry. Certainly, it’s not legal to own but nobody can prove it even exists! While Rebecca fired volleys of magical energies we shot bullets, and missiles with extreme prejudice!
Meanwhile, in Cortez’s bedroom his super senses, including his psychic abilities, had no indication of the carnage reigning down on his despicable compound. Despite him, and Duanna being 4th Generation vampires, she was far more powerful due to being over 4000 years old while he was a spring chicken at barely 1000 years old! She had him completely compelled in her sensual love trance. This was necessary to prevent him from psychically informing the royals around the world that Mystic Investigations had attacked him! The other vampires were quite young, and not powerful enough to do that. They were sire bonded to Cortez who was their Master. Their living dead father who brought them across into the dark shadows of bloody eternal damnation!
We landed the chopper just as Rebecca’s supernatural sphere crashed through the front doors causing splinters to fly about. Our talented paranormal team followed her in dressed in black military garb armed with everything in our arsenal! Drake continued to stalk, and stake vampires, and guards around the house while we took the rest head-on. He began rounding up human captives and guiding them out the back doors. Drake made his way to the basement and witnessed the sheer horror of innocent people locked away in lion cages. In fact, there were a few cages with lions, tigers, and grizzly bears in them! Apparently, Cortez was a big shot who liked to show off by wrestling wild animals and then killing them with his bare hands! Drake began releasing people, and guiding them to the exits while talking down armed punks along the way. He was riddled with bullets but they didn’t affect his living dead body!
Drake was about to unlock the cage of the girl he heard crying when a huge heavy-set 7-foot-tall vampire head locked him from behind! Drake was a very muscular 6′ 2″. However, he was puny in comparison to this vampire hulk! Of course, in the supernatural world, especially when it comes to vampires, size doesn’t usually mean a thing! It’s unknown who this vampire was but Drake was in the fight of his life even being a 5th generation 740 something vamp. He bit into the flesh of the vampires arm causing him to howl out in pain, and release Drake. The girl in the cage screeched loudly as they punched, and kicked each other racing around the room at speeds so fast that the human eye could barely keep track of the two!
The vampire hulk was getting desperate and started releasing animals from the cages. Clearly, the hulk must be the one who feeds them because they all ignored him, and went for Drake! He swatted off the behemoth beasts like he was batting away annoying squirrels. However, they were enough of a distraction for the hulk to get the upper hand. He got Drake in another headlock with one arm while wielding a stake from behind with the other. He started pressing it on Drake’s chest. Two lions and a tiger were biting chunks of flesh out of Drake’s legs as he yelled out in unimaginable pain! Then a big bear literally bit his balls right off causing a shriek so loud that it shattered all the glass in the basement! No worries those grow back on a vampire! LOL!
Upstairs bullets, knives, stakes, Chinese Stars, and even kitchen sinks were flying all over the place. It was a war zone as the mansion was lit ablaze by vampires bursting into final flames. Rebecca’s magical reserves were waning, and she took to hand-to-hand combat beating the hell out of two vampires via her Demi-Mermaid strength, speed, and agility. She then used her hydrokinetic mermaid powers to launch a firehose force stream of water from a plumbing pipe nearby. It blasted two other vampires right through a giant window! Julia Hathaway was tossing vamps, and human guards aside with her telekinesis when she came to Rebecca’s side, and said,” I sense Drake is about to die!” Upstairs Duanna sensed the same thing to her horror. It was enough of a distraction to weaken her hold on Cortez. He suddenly became aware of more than half his men being dead as the sounds of gunfire, and screams wafted upstairs with the smell of his house on fire!
Cortez attempted to get up but Duanna was on top of him. She held him down forcibly as both their eyes glowed red with anger. He finally launched her to the ceiling causing plaster to reign down as he sped away naked at super speed! After she hit the bed, and it collapsed, she darted away after him at lightning speed buck naked as well! However, a trap door was activated, and she plummeted into a sub-basement dungeon knee-deep with swampy water chock full of crocodiles! Somewhat dazed after hitting her head on the stone floor she raised above the water line to see a dozen crocs closed in on her with jaw snapping hunger for flesh of any type. She then had a sly grin on her face as she said, “Well this should be interesting!”
There was no lull in the battle to call upon nature deities for power so Rebecca concentrated all her metaphysical power reserves to reanimate her Mystic Sphere. It crashed down through the floor with her inside, and she hit the vampire hulk from behind sending both him, Drake, the lions, the tiger, and bear flying into a concrete wall that crumbled. All the creatures, including Drake, and the hulk vamp, were dazed as Rebecca helped the 13-year-old girl, and others left from their cages. Rebecca knew Drake was fine so she could concentrate on saving innocent victims. A head-on crash into a concrete wall was no big woof for him! The wild animals shook off the attack running toward Rebecca but she waved her hand, and they sat obediently. All the beasts were under her dominion courtesy of her Zoopathic animal control powers! As A Demi-Mermaid this worked perfectly with sea life, and to varying degrees with land animals.
The Hulk finally got up, and punt kicked a still groggy Drake into another concrete wall causing it to crumble. He then proceeded to launch himself at Rebecca! He tackled her to the ground roaring like a lion with fangs extended, and eyes illuminated in a state of rage! Her Mermaid strength was no match for this gargantuan vampire. He leaned in ever closer to her neck as he prepared to savor her sweet magical mermaid blood which would, unfortunately, grant him temporary Mermaid, and Witchcraft powers. He would be virtually unstoppable for a number of hours if that happened! Just as he was about to sink his teeth into her he stopped short with a dumb look on his face as he began chuckling like a little girl. Suddenly he burst into purple flames and turned to gray paranormal powder raining all over Rebecca. When the dust cleared the 13-year-old girl was standing there with a stake smiling from ear to ear. She helped Rebecca up, and said, “My name is Ella and I come from a long line of vampire slayers. I was in training with my mother Shasta when Cortez kidnapped me!” Drake hobbled over on his virtual skeleton legs with most of the flesh eaten off it, and said, “Let’s finish these bastards off, and get the hell out of here!”
Everyone, including the young vampire slayer, loaded onto the Mysticopter, and I forcibly declared, “Let’s light these bastards up!” Machine gun fire and bullets reigned terror upon the compound! The minions of Cortez who remained stubborn in the defense of their Master’s property met their maker! Ashley Abercrombie, and one of our investigators Elizabeth Weatherly, took the innocent victims away into the safety of the woods in back of the compound. We were hovering low taking out some straggling vamps running out the front of the burning hulk of a mansion in a panic! That’s when we let the wooden stake bullets fly free with reckless abandon! All of a sudden the nutty naked Vampire Cortez super leaps onto the windshield of the helicopter with a deranged menacing stare.
The red radiation of his eyes was so beyond bright that it lit up our dark cockpit. We could hear his spine-tingling otherworldly growling coming from his fang-ridden mouth. He immediately punched through the windshield shattering the bulletproof glass as he grabbed me by the neck! Hunter struggled to keep the chopper in the air as the rest of the team came to my aid! He ripped my throat clean out as Drake, and Rebecca dragged him in. Rebecca whaled in agony, “You killed my boyfriend, you damn filthy bastard!” She started choking him as Drake helped hold him down with one hand while going for a stake with another. Our teenage bionic boy wonder Zack Powers, and the young vampire slayer, along with Seth, were helping hold him down but he eventually launched everyone off into control panels thus damaging them.
The alarm bells sounded as Hunter had no choice but to land the Mysticopter! I was totally dead in the pilot’s seat as everyone attempted to fight off the crazed Cortez. Hunter got out of the chopper with his machine gun to finish off the remaining vampires who were running toward us! Thankfully a naked Duanna came running out of the flaming mansion. Although she was sliced up quite a bit from the Crocs! Everyone was completely tuckered out, and bloody battling Cortez. He was about to finish everyone off when he spun around and smiled at Duana who smiled back. His grin turned to grimace as she held his tiny black heart in her hands before his very startled eyes! She had plunged her hand through his rib cage and scooped his heart out. He uttered his final words, “You bitch!” just as she squeezed it to dust in her hands! He briefly burst into flames before turning to a pile of ash that blew out into the compound yard as nothing more than dust in the wayward wind!
Drake carried me out and sat me on the lawn. As he, and Duanna both bit into their wrists letting their healing vampire blood drip upon my absent throat. Duanna worryingly said, “It might not be enough!” Rebecca then took a pouch of healing herbs out and sprinkled it on the blood as well. She then recited an incantation, “Oh harmonious Hygieia Goddess of healing I call unto thee to repair the ravages of darkness upon the one I love! I humbly implore you to let your medicinal magic manifest through me with care!” The vampire blood and healing herbs shimmered red, white, and pink causing my throat to reform. I woke up coughing rather heavily but I was alive, and well! Some would think I’d be transformed into a vampire but one must have their blood almost completely drained, and thankfully mine wasn’t. Also, the magic intermingled might have stopped such a transformation as well. I’m not sure how I’d feel about becoming the Vampire Xavier Remington! All I can say is I really needed some cough drops after that!
[sta_anchor id=”mach” /]The mansion blaze was the biggest fire I had ever seen as we could hear fire, and police sirens in the distance. We all scrambled back into the Mysticopter but it waned as we tried to lift her off the ground. Zack Powers did some of his computer wizardry and actually interfaced his bionic circuits into the helicopter’s controls. It lifted up as the authorities arrived. We were about to be spotted so Hunter took a chance, and hit the experimental Mach speed button. We flashed away with a sonic boom into the dark night leaving behind vampire ash, and a wall of orange flames along with flashing red, and blue lights.[sta_anchor id=”Keanu”]
The Immortal Reeves Arrives!
Back at Mystic Investigations Headquarters Duanna, now clothed, informed us that Cortez was never able to psychically contact any vampires outside the compound due to being so enraged by our attack! We contacted our friend Sheriff Blake Maverick to get the Vampire Cortez’s human captives medical attention, and transport them to their homes. Thankfully most of them were in a vampire-feeding-induced mental haze. As it wore off, they forgot about everything including the vampires! Fred was watching a movie in our VIP lounge, and we reassured him that he was safe to live out his immortal life. However, he would eventually face various dangers both supernatural and otherwise. He needed a wise mentor who had lived for centuries surviving all manner of threats. We had called our good friend the Immortal Keanu Reeves about this matter. In fact, he was prepared to join us in battle but pressing matters prevented him from arriving in time. Although as we entered the cafeteria for a well-deserved post-battle dinner he walked from the shadows of the vending machines smiling. We all laughed at how excited Fred was as he gushed all over Keanu with gargantuan glee. LOL!
Keanu joined us for dinner as he explained to Fred that he would now be under his protection as he taught him the ways of being an Immortal in between movie shoots. Keanu was even kind enough to give a pint of his blood to Drake, and Duanna who said it was the best blood they ever had! We had all manner of food pre-cooked, and ready to heat up quickly since we’re always beyond hungry after a supernatural battle! An hour later the young vampire slayer’s mother ran in with tears of joy in her eyes as she embraced her daughter Ella. The Vampire Slayer Shasta joined us in our celebration and we spoke of working with her in the future. Some hours later Keanu took Fred to his house to pack before hopping a private jet to parts unknown. The rest of us ended up going home during the Witching Hour.
That night as we all slept soundly in our respective beds, we noted that we woke up in terror at exactly 3:00 AM, The Devil’s Hour! Just before we awoke, we all had the same vexing vision of the Vampire Dracula! I’m sure it was just a coincidence!