Santa’s Witness Protection Program

North Pole City is more than likely the safest place on Earth! Both cloaked and protected by powerful Enochian Angel magic spells it provides a hallowed haven for those seeking supernatural refuge. Just as the human world has its own Witness Protection Programs to shield criminal informants from harm so too does the paranormal world. Those in the supernatural community who know of Santa Claus’s existence can request temporary or permanent citizenship within the shimmering glacial walls of the holy winter wonderland.

Often these people are simply on the run from overwhelming nefarious forces or need a place to stash their family and friends while combating various paranormal perplexities. Supernatural warriors need to be free to fight the good fight without worrying about their family being kidnapped as leverage. In some cases, Santa may send Security Elves to hide and protect people in other places around the world. Sometimes secretly protecting people without their knowledge as they know not of Santa or even the world of the paranormal. There are instances where these people are indeed informants against supernatural darkness. Santa Claus may deal with the informed threat directly or relay the data to a secret network of paranormal professionals around the world such as Mystic Investigations. Saint Nicholas is a man of peace but he will never stand by idly when innocents are under threat of harm!

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Secret Santa Gift Unboxing


The Secret Santa tradition bolsters the Spirit Of Christmas further forth into the holy light of the Christmas Star radiating good cheer and peace throughout the world!

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The Terminator Attempts To Save Jesus Christ


The video above is a hilarious parody of Jesus Christ’s last days. Jesus attempts to deal with a Terminator sent back in time to save his life. So has anything like this happened for real? Jesus Christ was the Demi-God son of the Omniverse God. One of many sons and daughters he had. Christ was here to experience life as a human in this particular Parallel Universe when something weakened him causing the Romans to crucify him. Some speculate a force from outside the Omniverse did this.

In the secret ancient supernatural record there is mention of some individuals who were clearly time travelers. A few who blatantly stated as much. They indeed wanted to save Jesus from being crucified. There is no evidence that any of them was an android. One Christian cult that resided on another planet in the year 2841 kidnapped Jesus to their planet! They wanted him to be their personal God. Naturally he immediately set them straight and returned to his own time. He also stopped all other attempts at interfering in the natural order of things. The life he was meant to experience here.

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Christmas Pumpkins And The Origin Of Human Elves


Billionaire Bill Gates has hilariously portrayed himself as Christmas Pumpkins based on the Saturday Night Live character Davis S Pumpkins. However David Pumpkins is actually a real Halloween entity while Christmas Pumpkins is fictional. Perhaps a better name would have been David S Evergreens. A kooky character who manifests merriment and spreads Christmas cheer with the help of his sentient Snowmen sidekicks. Plausibly distant relations of Frosty The Snowman.

Human Elves

That being said there is a non-supernatural adult human chosen every 12 years who has 100% complete belief in Santa Claus along with a total infusion of Christmas Spirit within them. Santa Claus then reveals himself to the lucky individual and they are whisked away to North Pole City to become a Human Elf in a special ceremony. Human Elves are granted Immortality as long as they stay within the walls of North Pole City most of the time. They also gain Elfin powers. They are usually given delightful duties to perform at North Pole City and sometimes act as Santa’s goodwill ambassadors around the world! Noel Christmas was said to be the first Human Elf given the honor some time during the Middle Ages. Noel remains ageless as she rarely leaves Santa’s winter wonderland. The last person chosen to become a Human Elf was Casar Jacobson in 2012. In addition to this, various children are chosen every year to become honorary Human Elves.

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