Sinister Swamp Monsters

Do Plant-Humanoid Hybrids Exist?
Swamp MonsterSwamps are known to have large concentrations of life amid it’s forested wetlands. In some places there is a virtual primordial soup of biological, natural, and unnatural chemical processes taking place along with the programmed hand of the evolutionary Gods, and Goddesses. Within the green algae laden waters we often find a plethora of paranormal life. Especially when the waters are brackish in nature. In particular we note the notorious Swamp Monsters which have been used to label a number of Cryptids born of the supernatural soup, and/or call it their home. Many of which have been chronicled in fictional media whether completely manufactured from one’s imagination, or based on a true supernatural story.  For reasons unknown Swamps are ground zero for unique plant based beings of a sinister sort. Although the swamps can also be home to various reptilian, amphibian, and fish based monsters as well!

Animal-Plant Hybrids
When speaking of Swamp Monsters in the paranormal world we are most often referring to Animal-Plant Hybrids(technically only animal in appearance), or Plant Humanoids that may even possess sapient intelligence. In the natural evolutionary process both animals, and plants evolved separately from a common single celled ancestor billions of years ago. Amazingly there is only one true Animal-Plant Hybrid known to the mainstream scientific community. That being the Green Sea Slug that actually produces chlorophyll through photosynthesis. It gained this ability by pilfering the genes of Algae rather than coming from a long line of Plant-Animal Hybrids. In addition various top secret labs around the world are tinkering with the melding of plant, animal, and human DNA to breed a new generation of interesting, if not monstrously alien, entities upon our Earth!  In some cases coming up with sentient animated plants such as the ones seen in the video game Plants vs Zombies. So if such beings as this can exist then what about a 100% plant based creature that displays the mobile characteristics of an animal, and even the intelligence of a humanoid?

Various creatures created from the primordial paranormal swamp soup have increased dramatically since the 1950’s with an exponential boost in the 21st century. This is mainly due to the addition of human chemical, and radioactive pollutants.  However these creatures have always existed as a minority evolving within the protective microenvironments of the swamps murky waters that also imbue the air with a smorgasbord of transformative gasses. The most highly evolved Swamp Monsters are fantastical flora that swim about like fish, walk on all fours, or even possess bipedal locomotion with a humanoid form.  These bipedal swamp monsters are the ones paranormal investigators, and supernatural crime fighters deal with the most!  This is due to the fact that they can venture outside of the swamp for a time wreaking havoc on innocent humans!  Thankfully most swamp monsters can only survive in their home environment that is almost akin to an extraterrestrial world in some places.

These humanoid Swamp Monsters often reach well over 7 feet tall with weights in the 500+Swamp Monster pounds range!  They’re usually composed of dense muscular like plant cells with various foliage dangling off them. Their outer form is rarely smooth. Sometimes they’re called the Flora Sasquatch, or the Bigfoot of the Swamps.  Oddly enough they often have a Venus Fly Trap like instinct to consume animal flesh. Even if that means humans!  Only a rare few possess a human like intelligence that can lead to direct diabolical disasters! These dangerously smart supernaturals are often escaped lab experiments. Although it has been long rumoured there is a race of swampy plant people lurking about in dense wetlands around the world! Unfortunately we have yet to run across any that are friendly!  This is ironic considering plant life is thought of as the stoic staple of peace on our planet. Enchanted entities that survive by soaking up sunlight energy. Clearly the creation of a full fledged plant brain results in something different, and often negative!  Perhaps that’s why they are so rare in Mother Nature. They’re able to survive in extremely low numbers due to their long lived nature that is aided by the regenerative swamp soups they wade within. Plausibly some Swamp Monsters may be Immortal in this regard.  Certainly plants remain alive even after being cut off from their soil or water based homes.

Take care, and be on alert when exploring various swamps since these often green monsters blend very well amid the dark shadows of the foliage. They’re most often spotted when sunning themselves on shores, and logs alongside mostly indifferent Turtles.  This shows that they have a kinship with some animals while others they devour ferociously with glee! Theoretically they should be peaceful creatures who survive solely via photosynthesis. However it’s thought their large form along with their enhanced strength, speed, agility,and senses require more energy than the chlorophyll on their outer body can soak up from the sun.  So they must resort to large amounts of animal protein to survive, and thrive. Instinctual behaviour that makes them deadly apex predators! Swamp Monsters have been known to easily wrestle an alligator into submission, and devour it within hours utilizing their interestingly ultra sharp petrified wood jaws!  In the process of fighting wild beasts they may find their limbs torn off but the plant matter always grows back rather quickly. Especially after gorging on a huge meal, and being exposed to full sunlight for the right period of time.

When faced with plant based Swamp Monsters strong herbicides, and large sharp implements are the way to go! Bullets tend get lodged in their dense flora structure, or even bounce off at times. Chain saws are especially effective at sheering these terrifying beasts down!  If captured simply depriving them of water will eventually dry them out into a desiccated catatonic state.  Often being submerged in water revives them if too much time hasn’t passed. Deprivation of sunlight also weakens them causing their green form to wither, and turn brown, or gray in color.  Fire is generally not effective since they have so much water absorbed within their cells. All you end up doing it burning off some dryer hanging stems,and leaves on their outer skin.  That in turn makes them extremely mad!  Of course a good spray down with gasoline might be the great equalizer in such cases where flames are the only option.  In addition religious artifacts such as crosses, holy water, etc have no effect since most of these blasphemous beasts aren’t demonic based.

Despite all this you may by some fluke find benevolent beings completely composed of flora.  All manner of evil entities always has that one good apple mixed in with the rotten scum! There are also certain Swamp, and Plant Nymphs, Fairies, and other nature deities who may phase into our reality in a semi to complete flora form. These Goddesses have been known to create their own paranormal plant pets scurrying about underfoot!  Heck maybe one is even in your house as we speak!

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What’s A Reverse Zombie?

Reverse Zombies have a minor similarity to the zombies in the video game “Plants vs Zombies“. They eat plants but unlike standard Zombies, or the ones in the game, they don’t have any instinctual push to consume human flesh or brains. The Reverse Zombie is a relatively new Supernatural Being created by human scientists in 1999. These unsavory scientists were members of a now totally tanked shadow corporation that was a secret subsidiary of a major multinational agrochemical biotechnology company.  We’re unable to name said company for liability reasons. Needless to say they’re a corporation famous for dark deeds against Mother Nature! Ironically this zombie is physically harmless to humans but can cause devastating damage on crops crucial for survival in certain parts of the world!

The Vegetarian Zombies
The shadow scientists with supernatural backgrounds captured various standard brain eating zombies in the field, and experimented on the zombie virus within them.  By splicing various paranormal DNA, and RNA sequences they eventually altered the virus to reverse the cannibalistic cravings for human flesh.  Instead it was replaced with an insatiable urge to eat plant matter of any type. However the goal of the project was to create soulless sub-human weed eating machines with low overhead production expenses that would eventually rot into the soil as fertilizer. An effort to service third world nations who couldn’t afford their expensive herbicides, or who had laws banning them due to their cancer causing & birth defect effects. Naturally a great way for certain rogue regimes, and nefarious figures to utilize their pesky corpse baggage, and then dispose of them naturally!

Without going through the arduous, if not impossible, process of refining the specific flora target of the Reverse Zombie, they began digging up fresh corpses in graveyards, and robbing morgues as well. They infected the subjects with their new zombie virus thereby resurrecting the dead humans as Reverse Zombies.  There was no issue having these seemingly harmless monsters roaming about the labs, and corporate facility hidden in the woodlands of the US Northwest somewhere in Oregon. Unfortunately the janitorial staff had it’s work cut out for them cleaning up all manner of blasphemous biological debris, and the offending odors they left behind!

They began agricultural field tests utilizing brain embedded microchips that in essence compensated for their lack of additional zombified genetic engineering. The chip sent small electrical shocks to the brain directing the zombies to not eat valuable crops but rather the damaging weeds.  Things were going well so they prematurely began shipping Reverse Zombies to various third world buyers.  Unfortunately Reverse Zombies rot virtually the same as a standard human corpse out in the natural elements.  Especially rapid rotting took place in hot humid equatorial zones!  Normal zombies eat flesh to feed the zombie virus which in turn rewards it by quelling the corpse decaying process.  Eating plants on the other hand does nothing much as far as the virus is concerned. The Reverse Zombies simply have an insane vegetarian lust that is never satisfied!  They will eat 24-7 with a continuous plant supply! The issue of the rotting stink was dealt with via the corporations chemical deodorizers but the microchips quickly began dislodged amid the gooey melting flesh. This caused the Reverse Zombies to quickly consume every plant in sight wreaking major crop, and ecosystem havoc.  There were a handful of major events in the early 2000’s that were covered up by the shadow corporation, various governments, and the mainstream media they, and major multinational corporations control.

By 2005 the Reverse Zombie experiment was considered a failure, and virtually all the zombies were exterminated. However some escaped onto every continent on Earth, except Antarctica.  In the United States approximately four of the original test subjects escaped when their tracking devices fell off with some of their organs!  They went on to create more of their kind via transmission by crop.  The Reverse Zombie won’t bite anyone so they don’t create other zombies the old fashioned way.  The plants they chomp on retain the Reverse Zombie Virus, and when someone eats it they become a Reverse Zombie.  This usually isn’t an issue since they will voraciously eat every plant in sight but sometimes they’re startled or distracted causing them to wander off without finishing a plant.  A number of cases involve wild animals attacking them! Thankfully animals can’t catch the Reverse Zombie Virus so your pets are safe! Clearly the spread of the virus is a very clear, and present danger in farm fields, and backyard gardens!  So far the threat of a Reverse Zombie Apocalypse is thankfully remote!  Please take careful note of any deformed crops that may be zombie bites!

Like their flesh eating brothers they certainly have no fear of humans which is why a Reverse Zombie wandered into an Arizona supermarket in 2012. It proceeded to clean out the entire produce section with extreme prejudice as shocked shoppers gasped in horror!  The police showed up to arrest the “grotesque looking man who stank of wretched BO”  However by the time they got to the police station he was nothing but a twitching corpse decayed into several sections with barely digested fruits, and vegetables in the middle of the unimaginable mess! US Paranormal Defense Agents quickly swooped in to retrieve the corpse, and cover up the incident.

Interestingly enough the Reverse Zombie can be repelled with herbicide or with non-processed internal bio-matter such as blood, and organs.  Clearly most will go with the herbicide on this one!  The normal Zombie Repellants, that include various noxious plants, don’t work. In fact they will devour the plants without missing a beat!  Of course you can also throw any type of plant matter at them as well if you don’t want to deal with their terrifying appearance, and unholy stench.  Despite the lack of physical danger in their presence it is possible to contact their brand of zombie virus is you have close contact with them! If you spot a Reverse Zombie or any type of Walking Dead corpse immediately call your nearest zombie exterminators, or paranormal professionals!