Do Vampires Need Jobs?

Do Vampires Need To Work In Order To Support Themselves?
vampire-businessmanNo vampires don’t need careers in order to survive.  Unlike humans they don’t require food other than blood. Clearly they take blood by force for free from animals in nature or from humans anywhere!  Vampires don’t require clothing or even shelter from the elements since temperature, and precipitation has no effect on them. However some vampires might be helpless against mercilessly excessive hurricane force winds.  Naturally they could find a building to squat in, sewers, caves, deep woods, or bury themselves in the ground which they will do if caught in sunlight.  The holy rays of the sun would be the only natural element they’d need protection from.  Clearly vampires don’t require health care since they either self heal from injuries or die.  They also generally don’t get sick unless poisoned by something but again they will simply heal on their own or die.  These immortals of the night don’t require transportation since they can run super fast, and leap extremely far.  Some ancient vampires even possess telekinetic powers that allow them to fly.  Once airborne they can obtain supersonic speeds with practice.  The bottom line is that vampires don’t require anything but blood, and avoidance of sun for survival so they don’t require a job, or need to have any money what so ever.  Some vampires actually do choose to live like this off the grid.  Generally they’re hiding from vampire slayers, vampire royalty, or their overbearing sire.

Despite this most vampires do utilize money since they like to live in the lap of luxury as all of us would if we could.  Some do choose to have occupations to fill their lives with activity, relive their human days, or gain access to a group of humans for nefarious purposes.  Sometimes the evil ones enjoy gaining trust of co-workers before they reveal the horror of what they are to them.  Those with jobs have to file taxes, and often call upon the services of special vampires who handle the creation of new identities every so often when they’re forced to move on due to not aging.  Although there are those who utilize prosthetic’s, and make up to simulate aging.  A number of vampires also start their own businesses, or hold positions on corporate boards.  A number of large name brand corporations have vampires as stockholders, and sometimes their agenda is far more diabolical than just making a profit.

Most vampires steal their money since having supernatural powers pretty much guarantees you can break into any place, and take what you please.  They see holding a job as a human weakness.  Some modern vampires are even into hacking to gain electronic funds.  Especially those who had computers skills magnified by their transformation into an intelligent living dead creature.  Many will invest their funds, and take advantage of centuries of compound interest while others will just keep stealing as they go never accumulating much money.  They see the accumulation of wealth as a human like hindrance.  Vampires who have lived for over a 100 years are generally millionaires who live in mansions, and enjoy a sweet jet set life.  Those who are centuries old are billionaires who hide their funds behind dummy corporations, charitable foundations, and fake identities so as not to draw attention to themselves.  Many of these ancient vampires have tons of cash, gold, silver, and general treasure stashed all over the planet.

Our very own Drake Alexander initially stole his money centuries ago.  However he made a point of only stealing from the rich, or criminals.  A great deal of his initial wealth came from his days of being a pirate on the high seas.  A pirate who stole from other pirates, tyrannical royalty, and anyone else he deemed as evil.  He also always gave a portion to the poor as a form of penance.  He hasn’t had to steal for quite some time thanks to investments, compound interest, treasure he has stashed around the world, and his need to work like he does here at Mystic Investigations fighting the forces of evil.

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12 thoughts on “Do Vampires Need Jobs?

  1. Okay and great thing you’re not dead so did you get to fightt some ferocious monsters (aside from the idiots called anti-claus and Dimtri Diablo) did the hidden demigd and Angela’s energy help you guys a lot that what stereotypes can do

    • Yes it was a very active night of horrors. We’ll go into more detail on our main blog later. Everyone’s energy helped us out. Also the Anti-Claus and Dimitri Diablo are in a sense idiots for siding with evil but on the other hand they are quite intelligent, and deeply diabolical. Fortunately we did not deal with either of these dangerous foes. We haven’t heard a word about the Anti-Claus since last December.

  2. AnDagra:
    Okay and great thing you’re not dead so did you get to fightt some ferocious monsters (aside from the idiots called anti-claus and Dimtri Diablo) did the hidden demigd and Angela’s energy help you guys a lot that what stereotypes can do

    What hidden demigod are you talking about?

    Of course vampires don’t need jobs especially if they’ve been alive for centuries. Though having a job would help to conceal them and provide a hunting opportunity. Just be careful going into an all night gas station, bar, club, all night resturaunt, or anything else that’s open during the night time hours as you never know if an employee or customer is a vampire.

  3. You of course. They said that you were hidden for decades by your true father Loki and didn’t know that Loki could have a serious side to him, but then again anything’s possible

  4. Hello.. Xavier. 🙂 Yeah Drake did well as a Pirate. I’m glad he’s working with you at Mystic Investigations. I think it’s pretty cool how vampires can withstand the elements and bury themselves if needed. I believe a vampire can have a day job. If they get to work before sunrise. When I was applying for collage. The woman in the financial department was very mysterious to me. I could see she wore allot of makeup and I still could see her blue veins. She was pale and when I esp’d her saying..

    I know what you are! She gave me a very strange look. I believe she could be a vampire. She sensed me as well. 😉 I asked her if she’s enjoying the sun. lol I know I was irritating her a little.. 😉 Since she knew that I was onto her. When I shook her hand it was very cold and I felt a surge of energy from her as if she were saying to me… ‘”ha ha smart ass” lol 😉 She wasn’t upset just nervous I knew. When I decided not to go.. I went back to see her again. She said come back anytime and I’ll get you set up! She is pretty cool. For all anyone knows, vampires could work at Burger King on night shift. I don’t mind. 😉 I hope you all had a good Halloween. I didn’t get many trick r treaters. Since I have signs up saying No Trespassing and beware of Dogs lol My place is spooky looking on a dead end road.. 😉

    • Here at Mystic Investigations? I’m the highest employee President and CEO. I don’t have a salary because I don’t believe in overpaid CEO’s. However since I own 25% of the stock I get 25% of the profits. The lowest is the Janitor who makes $25,000 a year after taxes. We actually have a policy here where we in essence pay the income taxes by paying out incomes that will equal the real salary we’d like to pay after taxes are paid. So the Janitor actually makes more depending on the tax rate of any given year. We’d love to see the income, and property tax abolished from the face of the Earth because it only serves to enslave humankind!

  5. I meant in general, outside of mystic investigations. I don’t think that future where Money is destroyed to the ground will happen. sorry but that future seems too good to be true

    • Finances are hard to predict since they are intertwined with the world of the supernatural. The Illuminati control the economy of the planet utilizing demonic powers. In the short term I see a time when you utilize your Tychokinesis in gambling to earn money. However Clurichauns are drawn to you but thankfully your Demigod acquaintances scare them off. Later you perform indirect subtle probability manipulations to bring money your way. There will come a time when you are powerful enough that money will mean nothing to you. Simply because you will no longer need it to survive. Although I see you grabbing a chunk of gold, or diamonds from the Earth when needed for luxuries. Later on as an ascended God there’s no need for money at all, and eventually of course humankind will cease using money as well.

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